SorosFootSoldier [he/him, they/them] @hexbear.net

1y ago

Shipping CEO Angela Chao, Mitch McConnell’s sister-in-law, was intoxicated when she drove into lake, sheriff’s office says | CNN Business

www.cnn.com

That's right CEOs please get behind the wheel drunk and back your Tesla into a retaining pond.

68 comments

Vaxxed?
- Did they get her sperm in time?
she and her billionaire friends just got done with a Pitbull concert and she drunkenly drove her Tesla into a lake
The rich are honestly parodies of themselves. How did she not die of cringe before dying of drowning?
- Lmao you have infinite money and the worst fucking taste god
  
  What do you mean? Billionaires have very good taste, not at all gaudy!
  
  You take that back. Pitbull is the peoples poet, no one else can rhyme Kodak with Kodak
- ngl if i would have to suffer through a pitbull show id do the same.
- I can barely listen to pitbull for a minute and she's coming back from his fucking concert? oh lord LOL.
Queen. The Lisan al-Gaib of CEOs. The Muad'Dib of dying. Let her be the first of many.
- The Qwitzatch Haderach of drunk driving
  
  Off the shits on water of life behind the wheel of a Tesla Heighliner
Honestly, i wasn't expecting otherwise. My experience with people who can afford a good lawyer is that they already care a lot less about DUIs, and i doubt this gets any better when you can just hire somebody to drive you if your license gets revoked.
- If I was wealthy you wouldn't catch me ever driving myself.
  
  If I was wealthy I would be able to live someplace where I never need to drive
  
  But what about the wroom wroom
- I've heard night mare stories about the Walton's and DUIs. Seems the only way a cop can get fired and never rehired is if they pull over an American noble.
- Plus she was driving a Tesla, she probably thought the self-driving would be sufficient
Drunk Driving is proven once again to be the best feature of American culture
Poseidon is on our side, comrades
Billionares are so frugal now they wont even hire drivers
- Got to afford their 20th mega yacht somehow
Skill issue.
I would simply not drunk drive a Musk Murder Machine into a pond. But maybe I'm just built different.
What if Musk is secretly a class traitor trying to kill off his own kind, but Teslas killing normies was an unintended side effect?
Thank you comrade bottle of Josh
- A video of the exterior of the south side camera captures Chao at 11:37 p.m. walking “unsteadily to her vehicle while continuing to hold her cellular phone in her right hand,” according to the report.
  Chao is later seen entering her Tesla. The report stated that the camera then captured the car lurching toward a wooden barrier, reversing, turning to the left without stopping, and over the top of the limestone block wall. Afterward, the vehicle entered the water. A minute later, the vehicle’s lights were no longer visible.
  Also lmao why didn't she just WALK?? she had to drive?? she was on her property!! she could've just left the car and walked the like quarter of a mile!! I'm assuming her 'ranch' is huge as shit and the guest house is far away but still.....I would've just walked
  
  Where can we see the footage tho
Comrade alcohol is invading the bloodstreams of the rich
In 2009 she married a billionaire. He died a few months later. And then in 2012 she married another billionaire.
Angela Chao
Personal life
Chao married Bruce Wasserstein in January 2009, just months before his death in October of that year. She married Jim Breyer in 2012.
Also - as her car was sinking - she was on the phone to her friend for eight minutes.
Death
On the evening of February 10, 2024, Chao was celebrating the Lunar New Year with friends at her Johnson City ranch. As her guests began going home, she got into her Tesla Model X and accidentally backed into a pond. The car began sinking. Unable to open her door or to break the glass, the car filled with water. Chao was on the phone for eight minutes as the car sank, from around 11:42 to 11:50 p.m., telling her friend she was going to die. Onlookers called 911 and attempted to help.
Blanco County emergency personnel arrived around midnight and tried to enter the car. A deputy broke the driver’s door window and went underwater where he found Chao and dragged her to shore. EMS workers were unable to revive her, and she was pronounced dead at 1:40 a.m. on February 11; she was 50 years old. A March 2024 police investigation concluded that Chao's blood alcohol level was three times above the legal limit, and that her death was the result of an accident.
- Bruh 8 minutes with bystanders and nobody could break a god damn window? Go get a hammer for fuck's sake.
  
  Tempered glass doesn’t break easily which is why it’s useful to have those special pointed hammers for breaking windows in the car.
  
  You really expect them to get their formal suits wet?! Disgusting!
  
  I would not go to the trouble of lifting a finger to save a drowning billionaire, much less get my clothes wet for one.
  
  Live your life in a way such that when you crash your bazingamobile into a pond people around you will actually want to save you.
Getting absolutely blasted on sangria, trapping myself inside a giant bug zapper, and reversing into a lake.
- This is the leading cause of death in The Villages, Florida (besides old age)
my first thought when I originally read the story was that she was probably hammered. "out with friends" or whatever--- intended to humanize her but we all know what that means.
the other thing I don't understand is why there was apparently a pond next to a driveway or something. hindsight's 20/20 but shouldn't you put some kind of barrier between the driving area and the water?
- With the quick acceleration of those things, idk if an aesthetically pleasing barrier would’ve made any difference. She probably did an “unintended acceleration” i.e. brake misapplication
- She was hammered, pond mightve been at a safe distance.
God I love alcohol
Is it common for doors and windows not to work in this situation or is this just Tesla being a death machine?
- For most cars the windows will work for 30-60 seconds after being in the water. The doors will not open due to the water pressure from the outside.
  If you should ever find yourself in a car in the water:
  Seatbelt off
  Window open
  Kids out
  You out Don't bother with the window braking thingy unless absolutely necessary. They will not work on laminated windows, which are more common for side windows in modern cars.
  
  addendum: if you have doors that you can open via a handle on the inside, so non-tesla doors basically, you will be able to open the door once the car is sufficiently submerged, as inside and outside pressure will be equalized. Anyone in a Tesla is fucked though because those doors open electronically via button cuz that's cool. As far as I know at least, I will never enter one of those death machines.
you are a billionaire have someone custom synthesize some GABA-B partial agonist synthahol or just do ketamine like the rest
Skill issue
:O
Isn’t it weird how she didn’t have a driver?
Are they getting that scared of us?
- Who needs a driver when you have FULL SELF DRIVING AUTO
She just thought the pond was full of wine and her car would want a drink.
A cold plunge would have helped to take her out of it

68 comments