What is your Brown M&M?
What is your Brown M&M?
If you haven't read about it before, the term comes from the band Van Halen, who demanded that there were no brown M&M's backstage. People thought it was just a crazy rock star thing, but David Lee Roth later explained that it had a purpose:
Van Halen was the first band to take huge productions into tertiary, third-level markets. We’d pull up with nine 18-wheeler trucks, full of gear, where the standard was three trucks, max. And there were many, many technical errors—whether it was the girders couldn’t support the weight, or the flooring would sink in, or the doors weren’t big enough to move the gear through.
… So just as a little test, in the technical aspect of the rider, it would say, “Article 148: There will be 15 amperage voltage sockets at 20-foot spaces, evenly, providing 19 amperes … ” This kind of thing. And article number 126, in the middle of nowhere, was, “There will be no brown M&M’s in the backstage area, upon pain of forfeiture of the show, with full compensation.”
So, when I would walk backstage, if I saw a brown M&M in that bowl … well, line-check the entire production. Guaranteed you’re going to arrive at a technical error. They didn’t read the contract. Guaranteed you’d run into a problem. Sometimes it would threaten to just destroy the whole show. Something like, literally, life-threatening.
My Brown M&M atm is AI-generated comments like this (first comment is referencing something like df = ... that they removed from the code, but left the comment, second comment is super useless):
# Assuming df is your DataFrame
# Show the plot
plt.show()
That probably means whoever I got the code from just copy/pasted whatever the LLM spit out, and didn't actually think about the code at all.
What is a small detail that you pay attention to because it means there's bigger issues to watch out for?
The first thing that came to my mind was car repair.
This one wasn't one purpose. I went to a shop for an oil change and 10,000 point inspection or whatever they called it. I knew one of my headlight bulbs went out a week before, but when I got the inspection report, it said everything was fine. I went to the shop manager and asked him to confirm that the mechanic had checked everything on the report. I didn't blame him for the oversight, but he was kind of a dick when I pointed it out and had him do everything again until they found the problem.
Also, my dad always wrote the date on his air filters when he put them in because mechanics would often keep a dirty one laying around just to show it to customers and tell them that it was their filter and it needed replaced. He always got a kick out of calling them out on that kind of bullshit.
I'm one who does all the basic maintenance on my car, so if I had someone push a filter at me saying it needed replacing my response would be I didn't ask for them to remove it and I change my own filters. Then I'd demand they put it back in with me watching, because it's probably not out of my car and it's going to be very awkward when there's a filter still in there.
Got to always find a shop that you can trust, random ones will eventually screw you even in small ways. I've caught missing lugnuts and 50 psi on a tire, and from a dealership for recall work they forgot to reconnect something and it was running terribly. On the flip side the guy I know has called me on the phone and explained exactly what he found and a range of options and prices and recommendations. It's no wonder I return for his business when I need it, I don't have to worry about being ripped off. (I do still check behind, can't help the OCD when it comes to the car lol)
this happened this weekend, I had my transmission fluid changed at 125k miles, went in for oil this weekend at 134k, told me my trans fluid was "dirty and low". I use the Drivvo app and showed him I did trans fluid when I got new tires, wtf are you talking about.
I always used check the spare tire pressure and note of it was low. Nobody's going to question your thoroughness if you're checking the spare tire.
"this MF checked my spare, I'm not questioning whether he put washer fluid. you can if you want."
Partner and I once test drove a car that had "passed" a something something-point inspection at the dealer. As partner turns onto the highway he realizes it doesn't have a rear-view mirror. We were not impressed with that dealership. (Partner later said that when he got in he made sure the mirrors were adjusted, but his brain didn't clock that there wasn't a rear-view mirror until he had to use it. TBF, the missing mirror wasn't pointed the wrong way.)
Same dealership tried to badmouth my Prius in order to get it as a trade-in. Partner had introduced me as his roommate and driver, which made it even weirder.
Not me, but an old coworker used a similar trick to see if reviewers were actually reading his documentation. Before sending a large document out for review he would add a sentence to some random paragraph stating, "If you read this, come to my office and I will give you $20." Surprisingly few people ever came for the money.
We joke about putting that in report cards or other special ed paperwork where we're required to write paragraphs/pages of info that probably never get looked at.
I like to put my petty pop-cultural grievances in documentation because I know if someone reads it I'll probably get an IM on the subject.
"Delete the file and it will disappear forever, like the show Other Space that was never seen again after Yahoo's short lived streaming service imploded."
Ha, that reminds me of Donald Knuth offering 0x$1.00 to anyone that finds a mistake in TAOCP, like this guy:
Turtle.
My 11th grade English teacher would hand back essay assignments with grades at the top and no markings throughout. I tended to get high but not perfect grades, but the impetuousness of youth got the better of me. In my next essay, which I wrote normally, I wrote the word "turtle" in the middle of a sentence somewhere in the middle of each main body paragraph. Just somewhere in the middle of a sentence I turtle copy pasted the word "turtle."
That paper made a 94. There was no mention of it. I'm pretty sure she just graded on who she liked and I wasn't a problem.
I had a teacher who was rumoured to make up their opinion of a student in the first two semesters, then just eyeball it from there.
I submitted my final assignment hosted on a web server and gave them the link as my submission - saving the logs to see who connected to the URL. Anyway, no one outside me connected to that web server before it was graded.
83/100 which honestly feels about exactly what it deserves. So even knowing they just skimmed the source code on most of my assignments, I never found that the grades were out of synch with how I myself would have graded them.
When I first heard about the brown M&M thing, I thought it was just celebrities being petty, or maybe a joke. Years later, when I heard Roth’s explanation, I thought it was absolute genius.
I use this VH trick at work occasionally for fun just to see if anyone reads my service report. "Your boilers are about to fail in the middle of winter but don't worry I sprinkled pixie dust on them and did a rain dance". Never heard from anyone not even my boss. One customer I used to write "Does anyone ever read these? If so call me at (phone number)". I handed it to the man in charge, he pretended to read it, signed it and handed it back to me. The only one my boss called about was the one I wrote that simply said "I took a shit in the floor drain here"
Honestly, if it was me reading about the pixie dust, I would just find it hilarious and probably not mention it, since I got the joke.
waffle stomping!
I work in the event industry as a production manager, I get to write these things.
As is typical when you have a large crew there will be dietary restrictions, some of them can be deadly. So before me or any of my crew starts unloading the truck I need to have a cold Dr. Pepper in my hand. If I don’t, we doordash, we do not eat the food provided.
This is gonna be controversial.
When I find out someone is a Christian, I ask them about their favourite part of the sermon on the mount. If they don't know it, they're 'cultural Christians' who've never opened a bible. If they're familiar with the sermon, it means they do the work. The sermon on the mount is the section of the bible where Jesus explained to people what values they should hold and how they should behave in order to call themselves his followers.
I'm an ex-Christian and so are a lot of people who just don't know it yet.
What's your favourite part? I'm agnostic. I always say I have faith but religion can fuck off. I'm big on what he said about prayer in that it's a private affair. I also like blessing the righteous but then I feel people have polluted what being righteous is.
Sermon on the mount?
Tap for spoiler
“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.
2 “So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
Aside from the sermon on the mount, I'm particularly fond of the parable of the sheep and the goats.
Its the single longest passage in the bible about who gets into heaven and who doesn't. Surprisingly has nothing about accepting Jesus as your lord and savior.
Tap for spoiler
31 “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
"Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth"
At least I think that's from the sermon on the mount. Raised Christian, but I've been a self identifying atheist for about 15 years at this point.
You are correct.
Source: a different ex Christian
"Blessed are the cheesemakers"
In a former job, I developed "software" (I clicked together some LabVIEW...) for custom designed scientific experiments, which many other researchers (mostly PhD students) would use. Wrote detailed SOPs for their usage, because everything was wonky and in constant evolution, and in some circumstances, data generated could be wrong. So I put a toggle switch with some cryptic acronym on the panel which was told to be flipped in the SOP when users reached the part where following instructions was really critical. The toggle switch did nothing but to log time and date and what user was logged in. When discussing weird data later on, first thing I did was to check whether that log existed, and if not heavily scrutinized the data with respect to errors that could be induced by not following the SOP.
In Windows XP/Vista times I used to be the "computer kid", helping others in the neighbourhood with their computers, in exchange of some pocket money. My brown M&M was a huge amount of desktop icons - nine times out of ten it meant that the issue with the computer (typically "why is it so slow???") could be easily solved by:
- uninstalling crapware
- updating and running the anti-virus
- updating the system itself
- running disk cleanup
- defragmenting the hard disk
And boom, as if by magic, the computer was over 9000 times faster!
The desktop icons themselves aren't a big deal, but they show that the person is rather sloppy on maintenance of their own machine. And they probably can't even move files here and there.
I say howdy to gauge people's initial reaction when I first meet them. Their reaction to the corny and outdated term is telling about their mental picture of the world. It is the only time I use the word.
What do you feel like it tells you about them?
Emotional disposition, logic skills, open mindedness, how a person makes assumptions and inference, maturity, stereotypes, etc. It is a baseline of little value, but it is often a tell that indicates whether a person is worth the time to talk to further. I'm introverted and prefer not to talk verbally. I'm nothing like the typical Southern good ole boy in beliefs, politics, religion, science, or interests. I only like to talk to people that are abstracted in functional thought, that question everything without taking offense, or confuse words for intent or actions; people with depth. A person's ability to think beyond the first few seconds of an encounter and revise initial assumptions speaks volumes about what is going on in their head. Here in Southern California, if a person accepts the oddity without notice, or they take a passive aggressive or polarized stance, they tip their hand as someone uninteresting and not worth spending any more of my time.
A hoy hoy
I went through a cowboy phase as a kid, and this salutation is the only remnant. I don't even think about it, it's just how I've been greeting people for all my life.
I only really think about how it sounds when people chuckle or smile at it. It just sounds normal to me.
Let's mosey.
Permanently Deleted
Reminds me of a time in elementary school when our class had a lesson on the importance of reading all instructions before starting a project, then we had a test with long, elaborate instructions. Of course, the very last sentence was something along the lines of disregarding all previous instructions and setting your pencil down. I think maybe one other kid besides me got it and was sitting there while the rest of the class was furiously working away, some of them wondering how we were already finished.
Had a similar teacher as my AP US History teacher. I figured out you could copy/paste anything so long as it met the length requirements for papers. I ended up just using the lyrics to my favorite songs for every one and never got below a A- on any of them lol.
I had a biology teacher that just looked for key words and if they were there you got credit. It didn't matter I'd you used them incorrectly as long as they were there.
Whenever I show up to a "mobilization project" which involves lifting and mounting shipping containers of machinery and IT equipment onboard ships, I check whether the containers have had their grounding wires attached, as well as checking if the deck welds have been spray painted with protective coating.
If not, I need to check if the cable runs are properly done, deck fiberoptics protected from crane operations, antenna mounted without obstructions, etc.Checking random coax cable connections whether they've gotten a proper dose of molycote inside is also a pretty good indicator, but the tech department has gotten really attentive in regards to that. The grounding wire is really the only brown M&M I have left on them.
I work in live production, and have actually encountered the Brown M&M’s clause in real life. It was a small 5 person band. We had the show’s producer sitting backstage, picking brown M&M’s out of the fishbowl for probably 45 minutes.
They showed up for sound check, and immediately went “holy shit you guys actually pulled out the brown ones? We added that as a joke!” The producer was in earshot, and I got to watch him take psychic damage in realtime.
45 minutes? How many M&Ms were there? 🤨
When it's time for my car to get an oil change I make sure my windshield fluid is empty. It's a full service oil change and they claim they check ALL fluids. If it's still empty I question how good or a job they've done and what else they skip
My friend bought an old BMW and was taking it to the dealer for maintenance.
Every oil change there was some overpriced small thing wrong that he had to pay for and then adding insult injury at the end they would charge him serious amounts of money for fluid top off. The amount they charged him for windshield washer fluid was enough to buy about five containers of windshield washer fluid. So tired of these antics he went out and he filled the windshield washer fluid 100% to the top there was no air in the jug whatsoever. He took it in for an oil change, they charged him for a windshield washer top off. He demanded the service manager and said that he had topped it off to the very top and there's no way they added even a teaspoon of windshield washer fluid to it. The service manager refused to take the windshield washer fill off the bill and said they'd give him a credit for the next time he needed windshield washer fluid.
He never went back.
Honestly, the first mistake was a rookie mistake, to trust the dealer on maintenance. The dealer is always a vampire. The only reason to go to the dealer is when your trusted local repair garage recommends it when they do not have a real solution to the problem.
Good thing your friend never went back to the dealer.
Part of my job (fibre project engineer) is to oversee the building of fibre optic spine cables. Think of an 864 fibre cable snaking it's way through town with various drop off nodes for local access networks to be built.
I also oversee the termination of the cable in the exchange, and the testing of the spine to make sure it's within loss limits and that the right fibres are going to the right nodes.
I will often put a minor fault on in the exchange to see if the guys doing the testing pick up on the issue and report it back to me. Maybe a slightly dislodged connector, or fibre 275 crossed with fibre 276, for example.
Most of the time, the guys doing the testing will pickup on the issue and resolve it report it back to me. If it doesn't get picked up on, I'll make sure I keep a closer eye on the build crew.
I think this is pretty genius
I leave a statement in each version of my resume, and see if a recruiter mentions it. It's like "ask me about the western 5-legged salamander and how it's linked to the Olympics" (hint: 5 rings) or something equally absurd but a little more relevant.
If they say the line, then I know they read it. If I ask, "so, did you catch the Olympics?", and they still don't pick up on it, they're judged.
With the advent of LLMs and access to anyone, there's been repeated posts about instructors putting some oddball directions in white within the text of a question. Not perfect as a copy/paste into Notepad will show it, but it gets the laziest ones, especially the ones that don't even review what the LLM gave them.
I don't have photos of myself on the internet and do not participate in group photos. If I see a photo of myself online I know, for a fact, that the person who posted it does not respect my privacy, therefore they do not respect me. I will not trust them with any information about myself and others and in general will cut them out of my life if at all possible. Because of this I don't have people who violate boundaries they don't share, so if I said "Actually, I think I may be a woman" or "I have been thinking about leaving the country" they would not immediately judge or try to prevent my doing so, they would let me be and respect my needs. Also because of this I am much more comfortable working on things with these people to make life better and to invest in their wellbeing.
My kids school used my kids photos in their community outreach pamphlets that went to tens of thousands of homes in the area.
We have a media policy contract on file with them to not do this. When it was brought up they acted like we were overreacting.
I told them I had history with a stalker in my past that still tries to reach out and make contact, and they have endangered my children because of their negligence. I asked them if they were ready to open themselves for a lawsuit should anything happen in the future and the Superintenant just sat there quietly with nothing to say.
IMO people don't take their privacy seriously enough until someone is hunting them down to rape and kill them.
I used to work in serious sim. Think using game engines for realistic combat stimulation and training by the army. Systems had to interact and had different jobs rts, fps, driving simulator, etc.
So they each needed a unit database that was unique to that system. They also usually had a two versions a classified database and a less accurate non classified database.
A quick way to test was there was a unit type that was always set to invulnerable in unclassified databases. So drop one in the sim and drop some artillery on it. If it wasn't destroyed you were unclassified.
Seems like a really roundabout way to do this, surely a unit test (no pun intended) would've been a better solution?
We should have totally called it a unit test.
So the area for this was used for both training of soldiers and demos for people without security clearances. So it frequently had to be switched between the two. So you get everything setup and ready.
As a last test you drop the unit in and blam it. Then you go to each system and check the unit status. If it's ok you are good to demo to civilians.
A unit test wouldn't work because it's a deployment situation and a lot the software wasn't under our control. A lot of time it was just making sure the DIS HLA gateway was properly configured and entities remapped.
I go to peoples' homes as a part of my job, and it's often remarked that how messy someone's home is seems to correspond to how their life and state of being fares overall.
This does not bode well for me... Does it count if I clean up when I know you're coming?
A little bit but not entirely. It would count to be willing to do that but would subtract from that if you only did it because I was coming over.
So messy is good, or...
I've always loved a messy house. I think it's cultural
The opposite.
Everytime with a project when you ask a document that says what has been agreed with the customer and the estimate for a planning and they look at you like a deer in the headlights to then forward a document from the sales guy that just says "we'll do everything" and a phone book sized map with "a few additional demands from the customer." Yeah, that project is auditioning for a role as the Hindenburg.
I'm not telling as if word gets out people will do that. Just like lazy people now remove brown m&ms without doing the rest of the work.
No idea what field you're in, but of course you have to adjust it regularly. This year it's brown m&Ms. Next year it's a bowl of only yellow ones. The year after, it's Skittles (no red ones). Kit Kats already split into individual bars. A bowl of Skittles mixed with corn flakes. Brown m&MS as decoy for people skimming for the clause, then later another one about 3 musketeers at the bar. I could come up with enough for an entire career without even leaving the candy realm.
It's meant to be a very simple, but specific task that is easily performed by anyone that actually read and followed the instructions. It could be a bottle of Dr Pepper (as someone else mentioned), or wearing a yellow shirt upon arrival, or calling the lead "Chief"
Mostly I was being snarky, I can't recall a situation where I've been concerned enough to leave such a tell.
Though there is a good warning there: if people expect you are leaving a tell they will look for it. Splitting kit kat bars is easy and obviously not something you really care about except to check so they do that, then skimp on the hard things you care about in hopes that you don't crawl under the stage to check the bracing is done right. Thus whatever tell you leave make sure there are a few that are hard enough to check that they think you won't.
I guess it's not so much a test I perform but a signal I listen for. However my attitude toward lying is probably a bit different from most people. It’s a major red flag for me, and usually, people are completely unaware they’re waving it. Even if it’s something relatively inconsequential, when I see someone effortlessly lying to another person, I assume they’d do the same to me. The fact that they’re so oblivious to it, not even trying to hide it, just strengthens the impression that lying is normal for them. This applies to many, if not most white lies as well.
I need a towel hanging from the door of the oven or nothing is being done correctly.
This is really niche, but most organisations have a Microsoft Active Directory, or equivalent, that tracks users, their credentials, and their permissions. The sign of a bad AD admin: permissions directly applied to user objects without any intermediary objects or abstraction in AD.
Including links to progress pictures and files associated with my drawings on my Internet Archive profile in the description. Formerly I used Imgur to post progress pictures, but migrated to Internet Archive after I learned that Imgur implemented an expiration policy. When people in the comments accuse my work of being AI-generated, it shows that people aren't reading the description.
I need VIM mode on my text editor.
The best vim mode is the one not emulating it.
Jetbrains vim mode gets pretty close. My current issues with it are that I can't use the ctrl+o navigation to go back to previous location when using something like "Go to implementation" and import auto import is going to be the thing that's loaded in to the "." repeat action.
I've tried basic vim and IDE setup vim but Rider has to many nice things like checking inline SQL strings against a database when programming C# and that sounds like a can of worms to set up. I tried Lunarvim and it was really good but Rider just has a better debug mode experience.
It may sound weird but I don't feel like maintaining my vim for couple of hours here just to have all the features of my current IDE. I still use Lunarvim on smaller projects or to edit some text and whatnot but for work I really prefer my IDE and all the bells and whistles that come with it. For example I have Ctrl+. to search for an action "history"+enter shows the git history of the current file. There are tons of these nice things.
It's a good test when working with people that you don't know, contractors, etc. In the automotive industry we work with a lot of electronic system suppliers and they deliver embedded software in the form of ECU. Software in this form can hide a multitude of horrors so the only way to keep track of it is to make release declarations, implying testing has been carried out. If that's not present, you can't trust it.