You have 8 seconds.

Absolutely nothing, because I wouldn't want a stranger to talk to me in an elevator and I was raised to do unto others.

I feel awkward being in public without interaction. It's like my brain goes into overdrive, trying to predict a sudden interaction incoming like a quick time event
I'd comment on something slightly more relevant than the weather, because the conversation can then fade to comfortable silence (for me at least) knowing no more conversation is likely, or I'd do what I always do when someone engages - everyone has something interesting about them, I'll throw the conversation in random directions until I find a topic worth speaking about

The elevator is actually out of order, she likes hanging in there, but you leave as soon as you see it doesn't work
- Is she a ghost?

I make brief eye contact, purse my lips to form a half-smile, and nod my head downward. Then i move to an open corner of the elevator, i pull my phone out, and i end my turn.

The elevator stops at the next floor and a Chadbro™ enters. He does not notice you, and does not press any buttons on the elevator. He sniffs his pits before posting his hand on the wall beside the woman and whispers something in her ear. Her face changes to disgust and she darts a pleading glance in your direction, silently asking for help.
- I put on my robe and wizard hat
- I smile casually then turn slightly away from them before sitting down crossed legs facing away, trying to focus on my romantic web comics.
You forgot to roll for initiative!
- Combat hasn't been initiated. lol

Lady in red. It's a simulation, no experiment is going to show anything worthwhile.

Nothing and just awkwardly stare on the floor or wall, like with anyone else.

Well, considering the only elevator I take is to a secure area, I'd ask to see your visitor's badge and inform you civilians aren't allowed here unescorted.

She IS the escort.
I got a gift card from the airport for challenging the "secret shopper" once. Apparently had walked past four actual employees before I challenged him. I was on my way to the jobsite.
Why do you assume she doesn't have clearance?
- No access badge clearly visible attached between neck and waist.
- We have 11 people with clearance and I know them all.
- Only cleav..ance. Haha!

Absolutely nothing because people who have elevator conversations are not worth talking to.

Hey. Some of my best conversations have taken place in an elevator.
But yeah, I'm not worth talking to

That's because you have big jugs.

I mean, your boobs are huge!

I mean, I want to squeeze em!

Mamma!

I was thinking about this exact scene
Damn. Mod removed my comment because it said "boobies". Surprised yours is still up.
What the fuck was that x)
- Liar liar. 90s movie where Jim Carey plays a lawyer that gets put under a spell or something n then can't tell a lie anymore.
Risky click of the day paid off

Well, Pac-man was originally called Puck-man. They changed it because... Not because Pac-man looks like a hockey puck. "Paku Paku" means "flap your mouth", and they were worried that people would change, scratch out the P turn it into an F, like...

Were you the Pac-man guy?
- No I was the fuck man guy... wait

I wouldn't say anything because some women find elevator pickup attempts intimidating.

Tbf women say they find just interacting with men at all intimidating, see: Bears. I just don't talk to anyone anymore tbh.
I'm gonna die alone with my cats, but at least I won't be called creepy for asking a woman out for coffee!
Use the apps
No, privacy nightmare.
- Don't trust what the loud voices say.
  Many, if not most, women are normal humans like you, looking for interaction like you.
- Women won't let men leave until they've squashed a bug that's 20 feet away from them. The bear thing was always bullshit.
- No that's not fair, they do not. Don't be creepy in the elevator, or alone in the woods, or anywhere else where you guys are gonna say "because of the implication".
- That's just wrong and putting a blanket statement for no reason.
- Way back when I was single, I could pick up a woman without even having to corner her.
Just follow the good old rules of 1 and 2.
It's not hard
- Don't talk about fight club?
  DON'T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB?

"You gonna jump? 3... 2... 1... GO!"

Nothing because I'm taking the stairs

"I can be done in 7."

I don't understand. What's a uniform gravitational field and why does being inside one feels like standing in an accelerating elevator?

This is a joke about Einstein's form of the Equivalence Principle:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equivalence_principle
- Thanks. Let's see:
  The weak equivalence principle, also known as the universality of free fall or the Galilean equivalence principle can be stated in many ways.
  And
  "... in a uniform gravitational field all objects, regardless of their composition, fall with precisely the same acceleration." "The weak equivalence principle implicitly assumes that the falling objects are bound by non-gravitational forces."[11]
  I'm just beginning to understand. I'm not there yet.
It's just that normal gravity on earth feels exactly like being in an accelerating elevator in space. So you can't tell the difference from the inside. Like in the elevator you can ask them, whether you're still on earth or accelerating in space. Einstein used this thought experiment to develop the general theory of relativity.
Basically Einstein thinking about that weird feeling you get in your gut when an elevator starts upwards led to him concluding that mass bends spacetime making light from distant stars go in curves around the sun, which was confirmed during the next available solar eclipse.
- Aaah. I understand. :)

Omg girl, you look amazing in that dress. I'm so jealous. Be safe girl and remember to cover your drink.

Literally the only correct answer other than polite silence.
- There's always "hello" and "have a nice day"
- That's not how 'literally' works

Nothing. It’s eight seconds and both of us are probably going to be glancing at our phones anyway.

Get in the lift.

Stare while ripping an absolutely rancid fart that strips the enamel off her teeth.

Sharpie my number across her tits and give her "double-guns" on the way out

Thanks for making me laugh!

That's how you can tell if you're accelerating
- For a small moment in time my dick and my brain will have separable frames of reference

This is getting insane. I (somewhat at least) get those "you have 24hs with me" ones but what am i gonna do with you in 8 seconds. Id rather spend 24h with an egirl than 8 seconds with you lol.

I was expecting this to be a video where her tits bounce in an elevator. Thoroughly disappointed.

If a hotdog is a sandwich, is the ocean a soup?

It is The Primordial Soup
- I would like the primordial salad instead
A hotdog is not a sandwich.
If you serve bacon, lettuce, and tomato on a plate, you do not call that a sandwich.
But if you serve a hotdog without a bun, you still call it a hotdog.
QED.
- In German, that would be a just a sausage
- And using that same reasoning, a hotdog on a bun is a sandwich.
A hotdog is a taco.

Going down?

"Nice uhh, b-leather we're having, uh."

cry, drop my spaghetti and run out

How did you get into my private elevator? SECURITY!

You don't have the proper PPE for the radiologically controlled area.

Realistically nothing. You gain very little by saying something than you lose not saying anything. The only time people are somewhat open to being talked to, is when they already recognise you a little...

The modern mind is in complete disarray. Knowledge has stretched itself to the point where neither the world nor our intelligence can find any foot-hold. It is a fact that we are suffering from nihilism.

Nothing, I don't like small talk with strangers.

Tip my fedora and say M'Lady

Does someone have the rest of the photo set or video.... For research.

Is this elevator always that fast?

(Before hitting either the ceiling or the floor and both dying, probably.)

sorry, i have a girlfriend already.

I was looking at my phone and didn’t notice you.

"Are you an AI model?" #new_kind_of_creepy

"Damn! You do wonderful things for that dress." But only if I have an available exit to walk away after. That one's too forward for the actual elevator ride. Leave her an out, and also an opening.

Honest flirtatious answer: I’d say nice dress and match the energy and vibe of her response.

Not flirtatious answer: ”it always feels weird how you can notice the acceleration in tall elevators”

Your mother was right

Boobs are not supposed to be a solid blob... What have you done to them?

I’ve probably got somewhere to be, so I’m just hoping you’ll ride the elevator in silence like me.

How much?

True statement: when I first heard the Perry Farrel song, I thought he was singing "She's got great tits, she's got great tits". Turns out he was singing "We'll make great pets" and it was a song about an alien invasion of Earth.

from Porno for Pyros 'Pets' song the lyric is 'We'll make great pets'
- Corrected, thanks

8 seconds? Is she going up one floor?

'What a nice blouse you have on there'

Wouldn't say anything. I'd think about this song: "I took her to an elevator, I don't know why but it had to start in somewhere, so it started there".

“Christ, what an asshole, am i right?!”

It’s a bit nipply in here, huh?

"did you slap fletcher reed today?"

so its a rodeo

Give girl lei

Even superman can't it make hump for 8 second. 🤣

"Nature has been extraordinarily kind to you."

No matter how they look, no matter what they wear, nobody wants to be sexually assaulted. No one ever does.

Me: Barely looking at her “Ohh hey Trish, sorry for not calling you back”

Her: Looks at me weird… “My names not Trish”

Me: Glance at Her a little closer. “Ohh sorry you look like someone I dated once.” Go back to staring ahead and exit the elevator like a boss.

“Im sorry, but you are fucking stunning… if I told you you had an amazing body, would you hold it against me?” ^cue ^cheesy ^smile

It’s probably not going to get me anywhere but it might make her laugh, or at least not file sexual harassment charges for speaking to her… lol

Don't do this lol
- In reality I would do what most people would and just keep to myself…
  Just thought I would add some comedy to the thread 😎