Check In Thread: How Are You Doing, Comrade?
Check In Thread: How Are You Doing, Comrade?
Hiya! Your friendly neighborhood corgi checking in on you again! Been a while since we've had one of these. Figured with the election and all, might as well, plus I don't have any work yet today so fuck it, check on my friends!
For the new folks, welcome! I do these from time to time just to give people a space to vent and unwind, or tell us abotu anything exciting you've got going on.
For my own part, band stuff is coming along nicely! Did a gig with a friends band last Friday that went well, our second show with a 2nd guitarist. Writing and recording, new tracks should be out by the spring. Also posted a video of the show here a few days ago. Beyond that, work has been....eh. Still looking for a full time thing, its been 14 months now. AI training has me on a few new projects, but the work is coming in slow. Had to split rent into 2 payments this month and I was able to get the first sent out, but still worried about settling up the rest next week.
Beyond that, not much else going on. One year with no booze this month, so fuck yeah for that.
Hope you're well, and remember you are loved 
Not great
I mostly voted at all in order to avoid people I know looking me up and giving me shit for non voting, but voted 3rd party, basically camouflage.
But now it has me forced to pretend to be recently upset in my work and family social circles. I have to fake shock and disbelief about trump winning, despite me feeling nothing but more of the same dread I've been feeling for a while and would have continued to feel regardless of the results.
Silver lining I guess is at least I'm not so isolated in feeling like we are fucked now. Everyone suddenly agrees that we are totally fucked, even though their not realizing it until now is stupid.
I tried explaining to my lib friends why it doesn't matter who sits in the captain's chair of the evil empire and they got mad at me and I have rejection sensitivity so it hurts a lot
I'm sure its not as bad as it feels! How long has it been since you talked to anyone from that crowd?
It indeed is not as bad as it feels. I'm feeling better now but it hurt for like a whole day and I was ruminating about it lol. I hate rejection sensitivity so much. It wasn't like we had an actual fight, I just said my piece and I got frustrated feeling like I was being ignored by the group whenever I tried to explain stuff like that. To which I got: "Well, respectfully, I think you're wrong, and being kind of rude about it too" which hit me like a truck and made me cry. A lot.
This is why I don't post
Also, this is my main friend group so we're talking every day and I said sorry (even though I was right!!!) and now we're back to memes and jokes again.
a sister of mine died recently and a lot of my sisters r one foot in the grave. i feel like i cant really help them either. im scared im going to need to go on DIY E soon and im scared of needles. its feels so bleak out here, maybe im just a weak little lib tho.
Hope you and your family are holding on
congrats on no booze tho! huge accomplishment
Kind of depressed lately, but not because of the election. I'm frankly just glad that shit show is over.
I'm at work and I'm an eepy princess, fortunately I can take a nappy.
Enjoy your nap! Sleeping on company time is based.
Unfortunately that's not the arrangement, I only get paid for doing the thing. But fortunately I work for myself and set my own hours.
I just went to trader joes, my first venture into the public since the orange fascist won. I just felt incredibly sad, in my head about how all of our lives are going to get worse and we will continue to go through collectice trauma. Not that dems would have stopped it of course, but now there is a finality to how shitty things are going to become very soon. I honestly felt like crying as i was checking out...its very odd and i didnt expect to feel such emotion but its been a heavy 48 hours
Sending hugs
We all knew electoralism wouldnt save us.
We all knew the fascists were here.
Now is the time to organize. Well, years ago really, but, now is better than later.
Nothing really changed; the stakes just went up, and a few more masks came off. You still need to organize.
Pass out sandwiches and make the world better. Be the fucking vanguard and set an example. Or do some illegal surrealist street theater/performative crime to nurture the imagination.
Now is the time to act. It will be easier. I promise you can do this. You just need to start, even if you feel silly at first. Use this fracture in normalcy to act.
Call me a liberal, and I'm hoping to have liberalism snapped out of me, but I am certainly disappointed about the election results.
Mostly for revolutionary reasons because there is no way in hell a generation of "Yeah, I'm fash because it owns the libs" is are not going to be a bunch of lost causes. It's also a reminder of some personal griefs, that I am very unlikely to make friends with other men because I am that distant from what they want. I feel like an outlier among Gen Z, a generation of trolls.
Yeah, kind of liberal cringiness but I need to get that off my chest, if there's any way I can be reminded that this is full of shit I'd love to hear it.
I wouldn't call that liberalism, comrade
I'm older, so can't speak from a GenZ perspective, but you'll find your people. That does require going out and looking, but hell - I've met a decent number of Hexbears IRL and am doing food distro with one this weekend. People like you are out there!
I went in without hope for the election and I am actually upset that the Republicans look like they'll hold all three branches of government fully. That's not something I had considered since I'm used to some kind of division inside congress. They can do real freak shit with the whole of the Federal government if they can all get in line. Moderately big if since there are factional divides in the party but still there are valid things to be worried about if in the grand scheme of things the empire will continue on unimpeded.
Anyway, the material conditions drive the world and they will mold and influence you as well. It's important to build and structure your life in a way that can support your how you want to grow. Basically try to join an organization even if it's a glorified book club and you might meet good people and restore some of your faith in humanity and also deprogram your liberalism.
Flu induced fatigue hasn't gone away. Might just be one of those fun fibromyalgia moments of a new symptom to get used to.
A good 12 hours sleep last night and I feel like I pulled an all nighter.
Tram museum trip tomorrow though so that's fun
Hope you feel better soon, and have fun tomorrow!
Thank you Comrade Corgi
Congrats on your booze sobriety! I'm about to take a month off from drinking. I did it last year and really liked the change of pace, so I'll be doing it again from after Thanksgiving to Christmas.
Speaking of abstention, I'm on my first thc break after four years of daily usage (a day off here and there). The first few days were unpleasant (headaches, irritable, loss of appetite, bad sleep), but that is subsiding. I'm enjoying the clarity. I can speak more succinctly and clearly. I'm less impulsive and have more patience. I guess the biggest surprise is I don't miss it at much as I thought I would now that I'm a week off. I missed it a lot the first few days.
Otherwise, I've been struggling to get back into a workout routine (MWF) but haven't given up entirely.
politically i feel fucking high, like, this is the type of week that reminds me why i follow politics (in a jokerfied way). i'm not inside the great satan so really this only affects me through watching libs become disillusioned on the internet. the despair in me says that somehow none of these will stick and nobody's getting radicalized, but the meltdown is fun at least. plus, usamerican will be be more likely to give a shit about the world for a few years and trump's admin might get us closer to peace in ukraine (which is a lot more relevant to my area lol)
but on the personal side of things, i continue to be fucking useless. this job won't hold out for another year and i'm desperately trying to apply to PhDs to actually do some good in the world, but my god i'm awful without a clear, set deadline, which these don't have. i've always done everything the night before it was due and now i'm looking at blank pages and just... not filling them. for night after night i do NOTHING. i don't even play video games or sew or do the things i actually enjoy, i just have to sit around despairing that i'm not doing what i need to and want to. people have been telling me to get adhd tested for a literal decade, and this is the first time i kind of regret not listening (a guy at work says he knows someone who could sell me some adderal, but thats Very Illegal here and also idk....). personally i don't think i'm adhd, i'm pretty sure i'm just a lazy bastard who's never had to try academically, but still, any advantage might be nice 🙃
plus, i've now learnt that doing anything (like getting into a phd) when you have a dayjob SUCKS. my job is a scam tbh but even so, my noctural ass is having mad trouble staying up past midnight, and turning to energy drinks to fix it seems like its me immune to energy drinks. it just feel like theres infinitely less time in the day
thanks for giving us somewhere to say this sort of shit and reminding us to take a minute to contemplate, comrade corgi
Bad... Can barely focus on anything or identify how am feeling.
spoiler
I don't like needles but I feel like I have to start DIY testosterone soon so I'm in this place of wanting to start the T but also kind of not because of needles.
Hope youre able to get something worked out, godspeed on your journey comrade
Thank u
I'm pretty sure dysphoria is causing depression for me. It's hell and I don't know how to get out. It feels hopeless.
Broke my clean streak yesterday too.
Also I've just been throughly angry recently. Pissed off about everything. Bitter.
Don't beat yourself up about breaking the streak, it's all part of the process. Maybe the anger is related to the dysphoria? Do you have anyone offline you'd be able to talk to about it?
Doing alright. Went to a rally in my city last night but it was low attended and low energy besides the speakers that are already in the local activist layer. It’s gonna take a lot more work to get people organized. I think people are just over politics at this point.
The two year election cycle and it's consequences.
At least you got out there! Any representation from leftist orgs like PSL or anyone?
It’s Friday and I’ve had a Monday to Friday for a few months now 🎉 will try to get drunk but not drunk enough to get in the dawg house with my partner after work (congrats on being sober op)
Hell yeah enjoy! Have a drink for me!
Idk that I'd use the word sober, but I at least haven't touched alcohol in a year. California sober, as the kids call it. But thanks! Appreciate the kind words!
People at my work are sad and saying “We will get through this” which is obviously wrong but I understand the wanting to believe everything is going to be ok. The next observation often made is that since Trump won there won’t be violence. Clearly these two thoughts can’t coexist.
I figure this is when we make inroads to radicalize.
Hell yeah get it comrade!
Fucking exhausted. Having to justify my 3rd party vote to an old friend who is a bit of a social liberal democrat guy has taken it out of me. He heard my POV and we're cool, seems like this is a radicalizing moment for him, but it felt like he was taking his electoral frustrations out on me running through the gamut of lib media talking points. Also been working through some intense shit with my partner and not sure where I stand on things rn which has been fucking my mental health up. Also been getting my shit rocked by school but I’m nearly done so just keeping my head down and grinding. Hoping to find a new org soon after I get my life together as my last one was disappointingly tailist and was wasting my time. All in all, the usual
Congratulations on a year sober! And congrats on your band stuff. I really should drop by one of your shows one of these days. The show you posted had some great vibes. I am listening to it as I write this comment. If nothing else I can get some wings at Reggies if you plan on playing there again.
I ended up falling off the wagon a couple weeks ago after 6+ months and I've been half-heartedly trying to get back on it. Shit's just not great and booze does happen to be a tasty little bit of escapism for me. But I'm eating well and working out decently hard though so it's not all self-destructive.
I'm currently planning on what to cook for my DND group tonight since we rotate who's in charge of food every week. I'm torn between chicken adobo or Japanese curry with pork tonkatsu. Both are good options but idk which one I want to eat more.
Heya, thanks for listening! We've been working on the next record this fall - no plans on local shows, but we are looking, so hopefully do another one or two this winter!
Glad to hear youre putting in the work on sobriety, I do miss it sometimes. If you ever wanna hit me up about it, feel free! It's a process, don't beat yourself up over it.
Whats the DND game like? Cool story and characters? You DMing it?
Dope, I'll keep an eye out.
Thankfully I don't beat myself up about it. I know it's not the best that I drink but it is what it is. And given that it's literally tied into my current profession it's somewhat unavoidable. Trying to maintain a reasonable relationship with my drinking is the more important aspect that I'm focusing on atm.
I am DMing. So far it's a pretty basic fantasy game. It started as 100% making shit up as I went along and a loose story of saving someone's noble family from being poisoned has emerged as the driving plot point. They've been in by far the hardest fight they've been in up until this point for the last 2 sessions. It feels good that I'm starting to get the hang of balancing encounters so they aren't too easy. As for the characters, there are some people who are taking it more seriously than others and are more fun to interact with but generally speaking it's a great table of people to play with.
Late to the party with this thread but whatever.
A wide range of emotions this week but I think I'm back to feeling normal, if not motivated. The night of the election there were a lot of trans people who look up to me coming to me for consolation I couldn't give and questions I couldn't answer. I recognize that there wasn't really much I could have done to prevent this outcome but I still feel like I stood there and did nothing. I'm trying to network and see what kind of IRL organizing and activism I can do. I will say that the dissilusionment I have seen in my lib friends has been very good and I have been having conversations to nudge them towards more radical left thought.
Beyond that my experiment with vegetarianism has reignited my love of cooking all over again, the weather has been really nice, and I'm in this era of my life where I have never felt so very myself.
I hope you all have a beautiful day, be well <3
Sleeping well and getting back into running. Trying to ignore a lot of leftist posts to get involved in stuff. I am involved, just trying to lay low for a week and recover. Oh, and the album I contributed to was officially released on Bandcamp last week. Been riding that high.
Hell yeah sounds sick! How's the album reception been? What did you play on it? If you wanna swap band links, hit me up! Or just go through my post history, I posted video of our most recent live set there.
I'm flattered. I'll send a link your way. I just strummed my banjo and sang. It's not picking up steam yet, but we're kinda waiting till it clears on streaming sites to start advertising ourselves. This is my first actual contribution to an album. Before that I just sat in jam circles or did some FAWM stuff.
