It would be cool if we had a self-improvement comm.
As leftists, we understand that a lot of individual problems are caused by systemic issues. However, I think that there is still a lot that can be done on the individual level to improve your life.
Most online self-improvement spaces have a reactionary slant and are dominated by the same type of guy, which is another great reason to have a self-improvement comm on this website.
I'd like to improve almost everything but I get paralyzed and disheartened when I realize how far behind I am at my age. Maybe a comm would be cool though.
It's never too late, comrade! There is no point in comparing yourself to others since everybody has different circumstances. It's best to compare yourself to your past self and see how much progress you have made.
I recommend starting small and adding some healthy habits first. For example, you can download a step counting app and try to walk for at least 3000-4000 steps every day. I also recommend listening to self-improvement podcasts, since it's an easy way to absorb useful information. You can listen to them while walking or washing the dishes. I also recommend the book Atomic Habits by James Clear, it's a good book and has a lot of useful advice. You can do this chief
I started music super late and I've had a lot of horrible curve balls thrown my way that came with starting late, including teachers who did not want to work with my lack of ability/newness/inmmaturity and an insane amount of student loans that I had to truly suffer to pay off. But I'm glad I still did it, especially now that I'm starting to feel my time and skill coalescence into something worthy. I'm proud of my journey, I have a unique journey and I know at some point that perspective will be useful.
Additionally, I think there's an aspect/sense of journey that one gets that can't possibly be felt to someone who hasn't started. The journey itself is worth the price of admission.
In general, unless you're talking about something physical like learning a sport, you'll pick up things faster relative to people who are learning it at the socially appropriate age because you'll have more life experience and better time management skills.
I'd be up for this if we can mix together things in a way that makes it unlike any other.
Reading, artistic improvement, personal improvement, physical improvement, emotional improvement, spiritual improvement, interpersonal improvement, all rolled up into one.
Spaces like this are usually super exclusionary, cis white straight, the "improvement" is usually only in one direction such as something like getting physically stronger when in reality some people might want a more femboy body or a more womanly body or a more androgynous body and the methods for achieving all of those things are completely different. An environment where everyone is comfortable asking about all of these things would be a good one.
Yeah, allow any self improvement posts that aren't deeply problematic. Make it a common space for learning. We're all united in wanting to be our best selves.
My job has started to eat into my ability to take care of myself. In the new year I'd love to get back into cooking for myself more regularly, reading regularly (I read 50 books in 2022 and like 23 this year), and even just brushing and flossing better, but I really might have to leave the job behind.
The other thing that I've figured out with the help of a therapist is that my avoident attachment style has made it hard to lean in and be vulnerable in my relationships, romantic or otherwise, and that it's too easy to withdraw at the first sign of tension or imbalance. I'd like to do better at openly telling people that I love them or want to spend time with them instead of keeping my cards to my chest in order to accomodate and mirror how they're feeling.
Other than that I had a fantastic and exhilerating 2023 and mostly just want to build on it.
I've already decided that 2024 was gonna be my year a few months ago.
I'm going to get my upper body drum technique comprehensively together, I have just a few topics I want to hit left: the one I'm currently on which is shoulders and forearms, then I'll move to press rolls and then lastly traditional grip. I'm worried the traditional grip might take longer than I'm hoping so this one and the below might blend together.
After that I'm going to spend a few months focusing in on one drummer at a time. I'm thinking Max Roach, Art Blakey, Philly Joe Jones, Roy Haynes to start myself off. I'd also like to dig deep into Brian Blade, Kenny Washington and Ralph Peterson as they were two modern drummers that made me feel something when I first became interested in music. Some other drummers I think are worth investing into are Ed Thigpen and Harold Jones.
I am already a self-improvement freak and I would like to continue improving in many areas, including sleep, nutrition, exercise, reading, grass-touching and so on.
Some stuff that I want to do:
I want to learn to cook more healthy meals. My nutrition is mostly healthy but I'm always eating the same few meals that I've learned. I also want to eat more plant-based food.
have a regular sleep routine and read books before bed instead of shitposting in the megathread lol
read 12 books
exercise regularly and go running at least once a week but ideally twice a week
touch grass more often and hang out with people
There's more of it but it's all pretty basic stuff
I completely agree. When I was in a depression, I kept falling into negative feedback loops - for example, you stay up late, then feel like shit the next day, eat unhealthy food and sit all day. That's why I'm trying to create positive feedback loops, which is what you described.
I often find myself playing video games when I could be reading, even though I know I'd enjoy reading more, at least in the long term. Gonna try to change the habit.
It's the same for me but with doomscrolling random garbage on the internet. I'm honestly so tired of this BS but no matter how much I try to motivate myself, I just seemingly can't do other productive things that I want/have to. It's really disheartening, not gonna lie
I'd like to try to lose a little weight, find a new living situation, spend more focused time on my hobbies, waste less time mindlessly on the internet and maybe get a bit more involved in the local organizations. lots to improove especially compared to the current year where ive really felt i kinda let myself go
acknowledging bmf's sketch of a critique ("neoliberal-subject.jpg" or w/e), this is probably cool -- we're already posting, an ur-practice of neolib subjects, but working at setting and achieving goals, and discussing these with others, mitigates that concern, at least somewhat.
maybe there could be a cross-over with the theory reading group (is there such a thing? sometimes a book gets pinned i think), or the fitness sub.
Been drinking about half of what I usually do over the past few weeks. Started reading some decolonial marxist theory the other day. Going to try and complete the Chunka Luta network's "required reading" list. Choosing better stuff to eat. Going to try going to the gym in a couple months after the new year's crowd dies down. Things are looking good, honestly
I should probably stop vaping so much weed but also, i'm probably not going to do that
i also am looking to lick some capitalist boots and get a new job that pays more, i already started the job search. Looks like we're heading into a depression so probably not going to find anything, but whatever, i'm gonna do pirated job training so eventually i'll get a better job.
I philosophically disagree with self improvement as a mindset, this idea that you’re supposed to change yourself to be better. I don’t think that’s how anything worse, you adapt your circumstances so you are inclined to do what you want to do instead
Self-improvement implies an inherent dissatisfaction with oneself, a fundamental and cosmic insecurity which one attempts to overcome through superficial changes in routine or habit. It would be hypocritical for me to suggest people simply kick that attitude away, though, especially because it’s obviously instilled through years of social interactions and attitudes that enforce it; Not some sort of personal attribute
Self-improvement implies an inherent dissatisfaction with oneself
I would view it more as an admission that your current habits and behaviors do not correlate 100% with desired outcomes.
The idea of self-improvement is highly subjective and unique to the individual. You get to decide what is important to you and what you are willing to sacrifice. If you don't think you need it, that's great!
There is a lot bullshit in self help, but reflecting on your behaviors and their outcomes is a core aspect of the most clinically tested mental health exercises.
Yeah, for that to properly work you have to viciously attack and disentangle why you want what you want, how toxic norms and the productive mode of capitalism influences what you have been told is good or bad behavior.
There’s a reason why self-improvement spaces are made up of exactly one type of guy: It’s all people struggling to meet up to the expectations instilled in them of exactly one type of successful person.
This is why I despise the term self-improvement. It implies improving oneself towards some sort of better norm. But what is better, in this case? Being happier? Sure, most people want to be happier, but part of life is feeling sad, and trying to will yourself happier, rather than changing the conditions that made you sad in the first place, is a recipe for disaster.
But that’s probably the most reasonable thing people “improve” towards. For most, I’d bet money that self-improvement is about becoming more of a “Gigachad”, becoming more attractive, becoming more productive, or emotionally castrating yourself so things don’t get to you as much. Not because they think those things will make them happier, but because that’s what success and improvement is to them. And, to be honest, what improvement is to most people.
Now, don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean changing your habits or behaviors is some sort of impossible or inherently wrong activity, just that it should be done for a purpose someone arrives to while having the context for all of these things, and that’s my problem with the term self-improvement: It implies you’re improving yourself towards some objective goal, rather than just doing stuff that accomplishes the goals you have.
I would suggest a term like “revolutionary behavior” to reflect the sort of DBT-communist merge that I think both you and I are sort of reaching towards
Find better coping mechanisms when I'm stressed and feeling sad
Be better at asserting my wishes and boundaries in a constructive and positive way.
Be better at opening up about my emotions
Start the process of getting something done about my abysmal personal finances and my mountain of debt
Loose weight and get a healthier body
Dress better
Eat less junk
Get our new place fixed up and build all the stuff that's going to make it nice and cozy.
Have a social life and see people on a regular basis who are not family members or work related
Somehow manage my time better to get more leisure time and less stress.
All of these issues are intertwined and affects eachother. On good days I hope that improving one is going to make the other ones easier, on bad days I fear that trying to improve one will divert energy from keeping the other ones at bay, eventually forcing me to abandon my efforts in order to put out the fires created by neglecting the others.
That's a good list, I have some of these things on my list too.
My pro tip is to try making a bit of progress almost every day, no matter how tiny. Nothing is too small. Just having that feeling of "I am making progress" is really motivating to me.
My other pro tip is to track your progress.
I do it by journaling. It can often feel (especially on bad days) that you're stuck and not making any progress at all. I have made some really good progress in the past few years and the only way I'm aware of that is because I've been writing stuff down and journaling. If I didn't do that, I would feel like I haven't made any progress.
gonna be traveling from jan 8 until october so i'm prolly gonna lose a bunch of weight and get tan just from that. otherwise im tryna cut back on drinking and weed, plus learn to code(tm) so i can get a less boring office job if teaching english doesn't work out
I have a yearlong membership to a music learning program and I will practice [the instrument I play] every day. Even if it's only 5 minutes I will not go a day without touching it unless I'm traveling.
Also I have to exercise more, I'm at the age where I can't afford not to be fit. 2x a week minimum but 4x would be ideal.