don't worry in the article body they had to signal that nothing will fundamentally change:
Qassem Soleimani, after a U.S. drone strike executed the Iranian external-security chief in January 2020. Soleimani, whom the United States declared to be a terrorist and killed as such, killed far more people than Timothy McVeigh. But even if we attribute to him all the deaths in the Syrian Civil War,
Holy shit it actually happened. There's been so many joke posts about this that I had to double check.
Rest in piss, asshole. I hope I can find your grave so I can take a giant shit on your grave and make your racist ass devour all my nutrients into your body.
With joyous rapture and exuberant glee, I extend to you this missive, bedecked in the finest hues of elation and draped in the silken threads of serendipity. As the celestial dance of fate unfolds, a tapestry of jubilation is woven, and I find myself compelled to share in the cadence of mirth that now graces your doorstep.
Behold, for in the serendipitous symphony of existence, a melodious chord has resonated, echoing the harmonies of unanticipated delight. The universe, in its cosmic benevolence, has cast upon your path an unexpected bouquet of felicity, a fragrant bloom plucked from the garden of fortuitous happenstance.
In the hallowed chambers of happenstance, where the whims of destiny frolic in a ballet of chance, there emerges a vignette of bliss, an unforeseen sonnet that quickens the pulse and elicits a cascade of laughter from the very depths of the soul.
As the stars themselves align to applaud this marvel, let us together revel in the splendor of this celestial jest, for it is not every day that the cosmos bestows upon us such an enchanting surprise. Like a celestial waltz, we dance in the ethereal glow of this unforeseen delight, our hearts attuned to the celestial rhythm of euphoria.
May the winds of fortune continue to whisper sweet tidings in your ear, and may the symphony of joy play on, resounding through the corridors of time. In this moment, let us savor the nectar of unexpected ecstasy, embracing the beauty of the unforeseen with open arms and grateful hearts.
With jubilant exultation and a cascade of celestial confetti,