Finally some fad I can identify with, except I'm not a girl. And I'm not pretty. And I'm not Syndrome. But everybody treats me like gold (I'm heavy and malleable)
It really is a thing. I went on one date with this super attractive redhead, and we were planning a second date, but I canceled because the time we were supposed to have together she whittled down (on the morning of) to just a couple hours she could pencil me in for. She got annoyed with me and became passive-aggressive because I didn't want to drive for two and a half hours round trip to her town for a two-hour date.
I didn't like the passive-aggression and explained that to her kindly. She got even more passive-aggressive at that. I told her I was no longer interested in dating her. She went ballistic, shit-talking me in a mutual FB group we were a part of, stalking my posts and comments on there so that she could add heart reacts to every single one before I blocked her.
I really should have known better than to try to date her as the first time I got to know her was when I was on vacation with my girlfriend in New Orleans where this woman and her husband were celebrating their one-year anniversary and we all met up for dinner, and she later told me they had a knock-down, drag-out fight in their hotel room.
Ok just my opinion, so clearly there might be some flack from the community, but I am glad she writes articles like this. It seems to be her form of outlet to process her emotions, decisions and their consequences. I think that is what these articles are an account from a person who knows they are flawed, knows they do not make the right decisions but are making decisions that are against common sense and she is documenting it as she goes. It is fascinating and past the schadenfreude that her consequences have given, the handful of articles I have quickly glanced she seems to be brutality honest discussion about her decisions and her struggles with the consequences.
reading the cheating article, it's pretty clear these guys were gonna divorce anyway.
It's a mistake not to separate and tell your kids before meeting someone else, but from reading what happened it looks like their marriage deteriorated to the point of completely ignoring each others existence, she finds happiness in someone who actually likes her being around, gives her the push to finalize the divorce.
Understandable perhaps but not exactly the right thing to do.
The way the meme is edited it makes it look like the husband found out and kicked her out and she deserves to be poor, reading the articles it looks like the classic case of "Mother drops everything for family, Father has to be forced to continue child support after divorce and does everything he can to avoid it."
Which, honestly, I support. Everyone knows that's part of marriage now, if you can't abide by the terms of the contract, don't enter into the legally binding partnership.
Really feels like all of these can be true at the same time. She says in the article she doesn’t promote cheating, that it was wrong, and that it didn’t fix the problems she was facing in her marriage. Divorces suck. There’s a reason they’re a flash point for manosphere grifters to latch onto. The family unit is a means of wealth redistribution. We have a system where doing the right thing and ending a shitty relationship means you now have to pay double your bills with the same income and you’re also losing tax credits and sometimes benefits.
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Just for some pretext here: I'm not trying to defend this woman because I know nothing about her.
That being said and just for everyone's information, there is a scenario in which what she said is logical and fair.
It used to be that women were not allowed to have careers and some people still choose to practice that. So the women agree when entering into the marriage that they'll be homemakers and the husband will earn money and take care of her. If the husband doesn't keep up his end of the duties in that arrangement and they wind up being divorced then she now has no means to provide for herself. This is why alimony was initially created, so that women who were forced (or in the modern day chose) to be homemakers weren't absolutely fucked in the case of divorce.
Again, I'm not saying that's what's happening here, I have no idea, but I just wanted to provide some potential context because I find a lot of talk about alimony and divorce online often just dumps on women as being greedy and that's just not fair in every situation.
I gotta say though, it sure looks that way in this situation, especially with her talking about cheating on her husband, but again, who knows, maybe he's not holding up his end, maybe he's physically or emotionally abusive, we just don't know.
Alimony is off the table when infidelity can be proved in court. This was the case even when alimony was super common back in the 80s and 90s.
If you were a homemaker seeking divorce you could get alimony without being a perfect person, but infidelity was one of the few instant "no"s in divorce court.
I think that’s fair too. If someone destroys their marriage by cheating on their wife/husband it’s not surprising they wouldn’t be entitled to supplemental income
That is entirely untrue for divorce in Ontario, and probably other parts of Canada. Spousal support and divorce settlements in general have nothing to do with infidelity. No-fault divorce is available after 1 year of separation. For the financials the court uses a formula based on length of marriage and relative incomes as their guideline.
It's pretty obvious she has a career writing magazine articles complaining about her life, so she should have some sort of income, and alimony shouldn't count. Never mind all of the infidelity that everyone else is mentioning.
We are totally ok with that truth. It just isn't relevant here. Especially given the 4th headline "I divorced my husband because I couldn't trust him with my money". It seems like her financial troubles and his lack of financial troubles had nothing to do with the state of their finances during the marriage. And if alimony is involved at all, it would be a contributor to her post divorce financial problems, as it sounds like she would be the one paying if there is any.