I like women but I also like cock but I'm not otherwise attracted to the male body at all. Wtf is my sexual orientation? AITA?
I like women. I like the shape and curves of the female body. I like boobs, I like asses, I like pretty vaginas. I also appreciate and am aroused by a nice cock. I'm however not otherwise attracted to the male body. I like femboys as long as they have a feminine-like shape and curves, as many of them do.
Strictly speaking, that's simply bisexual. Femboys are boys. That being said, there is no "correct" answer here that anyone else can give you.
The correct label is the one that helps you navigate the world and your own needs the best. If bisexual fits, congrats, that's it. If it doesn't, it's not, and your search continues :)
I guess you're some flavor of bisexual as you are attracted to some men (based on the femboy remark) though you've got a distinct preference for femininity even in men. If you go scrolling through old Tumblr posts long enough you'll probably find a term someone coined back in 2013 for your exact orientation... But, like, IDK man don't overthink it. If anyone asks just say whatever feels right in that moment, straight/bi/pan/whatever.
And remember saying you identify with a particular orientation isn't some huge commitment. Saying you're bi (for instance) doesn't mean you're attracted to all men, and no reasonable person would expect that. We all have preferences within our orientation.
AITA?
No. You're figuring it out. It's okay to not have all the answers
Sexuality is a spectrum that doesn't have clean boundaries. Some people exist in an area that could be considered "straight," for example, but there aren't hard walls blocking straight people from leaving or queer people from entering.
The less you try to define your sexuality and the more you try to be comfortable with liking what you like, the happier you'll be.
What incredibly enough hasn't been brought up yet, is the distinction between gender preference and genital preference. In heteronormativity they're assumed to be the same, but in reality they're not. This way of thinking also lends itself to the flexibility you're describing; note the word "preference".
You get out there and suck a few girl cocks. Only then will you know the truth of your desires. I mean how bad could it be? Personally wouldn't worry about it. If the dude who's cock you're sucking thinks you're not gay then I would trust him.
I personally struggled for a long time trying to find the right label for my gender and sexuality. In the end, the right label for both is "just me". Whatever I'm attracted to is what I'm attracted to. Whatever I feel like on a certain day is what gender I am. Just me doing me things
I understand your position. I feel the exact same way. I identify much like you, I am attracted to the feminine features not whatever label you have or what have been biologically created between your legs.
When I was younger I just told myself "nah I'm straight", and somewhere realized that i might be what people called "bi-curious". But after a while I realized I had no interest in masculinity or "regular" males.
Being able to detach social gender labels from biological genitalia and therefore further deepen my understanding and acceptance of trans and LGBTQ people helped me a lot with accepting myself and my preferences.
As for your question, it really doesn't matter. What matters is that you know what you like. Who you decide to spend time with or engage in sexual relations with is up to the people involved and no one else. I ultimately decided to still just call myself straight. Is it entirely correct? Maybe not, but it sure is the easiest.
Enjoy life, hook up with a femboy, get pegged or have a one night stand with a 6,8 mega masculine dude. It's up to you, the thing that matters is that you know what you enjoy.
Life is to short to put labels on dicks and vaginas. Just fuck it instead.
Or just dont label it. Labels keep us in boxes and boxes cause stress when we inevitably find out we dont fit in the box.
I came up with this idea err metaphor? Thought experiment? Anyway
Think of the shape of a 6 point star. If you are star shaped you will fit perfectly, if you are triangle shaped you will also fit, or if you are diamond shaped or a circle or a hexagon or many many other shapes.
But only a star fits perfectly.
(Heres a crude drawing of it)
You can spend years in the star box thinking its a perfect fit before you realise theres something different, something not quite right and you suddenly see that you were a triangle the whole time.
Just let go of the labels and be you, its alot more spacious outside of the box, and you dont have to be a certain way to fit in.
I long ago decided that is humans aren't attracted to "male" or "female", we're attracted to "masculinity" or "femininity". Gender has nothing to do with it.
It's why, like you, I can be attracted to a feminine looking trans woman, but not a masculine looking one, or a dude.
it's why homosexuals can be masculine or feminine (bear or boujee), and be attracted to one or three other, or both.
Masculinity and feminity has nothing to do with whether one has a cock or a vagina.
Humans aren't attracted only to genitalia since that shit is hard to see from afar, evolutionarily it makes sense we'd find secondary sexual characteristics attractive also, overall body shapes, hair, skin etc.
So you don't like penises per se, you like penises when attached to otherwise people who tick those feminine boxes you care about whether they be trans or just crossdressers.
That's actually really common I find because almost every single man I dated gave that same take, they all considered themselves straight and were never with a trans woman before me.
I'd say you're pretty much just straight with a specific penis fetish, even bi people IRL generally date people who are all the way masc and all the way fem.
Not to gatekeep being bi though if that's what you feel more comfortable with - go for it.
Otherwise just love who you love and move on with it.
Sounds like you are very similar to me and a billion or so other people. I don't see much point in creating a label for yourself in order to restrict yourself to that label. You are what you are and don't worry about it. I had a thing with a trans woman for a while and now I'm happily married with kids. Whatever I am has never had a negative affect on my life because I don't worry about what I am.
Basically, finsexuals are attracted to feminine presenting people independent of sex or gender. If I understood you correctly, its the feminine presentation that appeals to you?
You dont habe to be attracted to all genders the same way to be BI. You can have a preference or stronger attraction to certain genders and presentations. If you think that some non-binary people and fem-boys are attractive then ur probably Bi
My personal preference of naughty bits is Boobs, Cock, Woman-Ass, Man-ass, and Pussy. (Most attractive to least). I'm also theoretically attracted to pretty much anyone but emotional bonds really get my motor running.
I just say I'm Pan and leave it at that - labels rarely fit precisely.
Thank you for asking this. I'm the same way but never got around to asking. I also like trans women as well (not just sexual), so there's that. Best of both worlds imo lol
Polysexuality has been defined as "encompassing or characterized by many different kinds of sexuality", and as sexual attraction to many, but not all, genders. [...] Polysexuality is also considered to be another word for bisexuality however unlike bisexuals, polysexuals are not necessarily attracted to people of the same gender.
I think 'polysexual' fits. You like some genders (cis women, trans women, feminine-presenting people, AFAB NBs, etc.), but not all.
I've always felt that it wasn't anyone's business but my own and the person I want to touch. I don't worry about putting myself in a box so I don't wear a label.
Those that "need" to know are told that I am "independent". What does that mean to me? It means I decide who I want to fool around with. Sex is more than just tabs and slots.
Although I have found that this answer is unacceptable to nearly everyone, so I can't say I recommend it.
If you want to know where I stand, my trans boyfriend came out a long time into our long distance relationship and he wanted surgery. I was a bit torn on the idea, but what really sold me was that he was gonna have a dick if he did surgery. THAT was cool with me, and likewise with the body shape thing. Boobs, ass, vagina, dick is all good with me, balls included.
And the cool thing is? He's having second thoughts on it now that he's moved in with me and away from their parents. Given the freedom to choose gender identity regardless of their body, they are a lot happier and don't need to pigeonhole themselves into a sexual/gender stereotype. I, for one, don't care. His sexual orientation is demisexual due to need for emotional connection, whilst mine is pansexual(?) because I honestly don't care. He does it for me and that's great.
It might be comforting to know that pansexual as a label exists and that your preferences are shared with others. You might find quite the assortment of... 2d images online. By the ratios it's 8:5:1 for female bodies:male bodies:female bodies with dicks. Really, it's not that uncommon. You might find even more freedom once you find the people that give you the liberty to truly own my desires. Feel free to interact with femboys, strapon girls, intersex people, whatever and wherever. Your sexual arousal needs no words to justify itself.
If you want a label, I feel "polysexuality" fits what you're describing.
Honestly, I'd just tell people you're straight though. If trans women are women, then liking transwomen is straight. Any anyone you're not sleeping with doesn't have any business inquiring about your partner's (or your) genitals.
Its quite common for some straight men to only be attracted to penises. All men generally have an dying love for their own penis so it make sense that it spreads to some other penises. But here is the things about labels you can really pick whatever you want. You can call yourself bi or straight or whatever label you want.
I've heard the term heteroflexible. Maybe that suits you. But in the end I think labels aren't really necessary. You like what you like. And there are so many facettes to that it is probably impossible to invent a label for everything that is possible.
My interpretation is you enjoy looking at it the same way you enjoy watching other people have fun. You know what it's pleasure feels like so it's familiar. I suspect this is also a driving factor for a preference for anal porn. Men don't know what it's like to have vagina, but they've got some key similarities to a female ass in sensation (that's not a joke about a butt being a butt, the vagina and clitoris has nerve endings that are stimulated during anal).
I feel like when I was growing up, you just were in a fairly coarse bucket as your label with the assumption that people could have very different preferences within there.
The way I would have characterized what you described as being bi because you are interested in both genders' genitalia, but had a preference for feminine body types.
Everyone is sexually fluid and where they sit on the spectrum will depend on the person. Nothing says you need to start dating guys, maybe some occasional porn does it for you?