Lemmings who have a ringtone with vocals... why?

How else are people at Trader Joes going to hear Cannibal Corpse?

My message recieved-ring tone is Sergeant Doakes saying "Surprise motherfucker!".

The real question is why would you have it any other way?

Obviously you're referring to James Doakes (from the tv show), but I'm now picturing Albert Doakes (from the books) trying to say this. It's much more amusing.
For a long time mine used to be "mail motherfucker" from Eurotrip (movie)

🎶 Doofenschmirtz Evil Incorporaaateeed 🎶, that's why, and that's the only justification needed.

Had an old on and off girlfriend - fantastic body, great sex, mad as a box of minions. Not a healthy relationship and 1.5 years later going nowhere. When she’d call, the iPhone would ring with Alan Parsons Project:

Don't answer me

Don't break the silence, don't let me win

Don't answer me

Stay on your island, don't let me in

Run away and hide from everyone

Worked a treat.

I don't understand ever under any circumstances having your phone on anything but vibrate.

Because maybe I want to be alerted when my phone goes off?
- Why doesn't vibrate alert you?
If you're being physically active you might not notice the vibrations, it also makes it easier to find when you're aloof and set it somewhere random. If you're dressed in multiple layers you wouldn't notice it, also might not have pockets.
- What's your point? I'm not going to answer anyway so not even noticing just skips a step
On call schedules, in your gym bag. I imagine the vast majority of them are less attached to their phones and develop habits of leaving it in the other room for a while.
Are you kidding? Vibrate is way worse.
- No it's not, are you also kidding?

Question is... why not?

It feels weird when some dude starts singing when someone calls someone.
- Feels weird to whom?

Since I own a smart watch my ringer is set to silent 99.99% of the time. A tiny buzz on my wrist is all I need, also no notifications for any type of social media to minimise screen time.

My in-laws on the other hand are both max volume ringtones with vocal-kind of people. It frightens me every time I'm driving with my father-in-law and his phone starts blasting the theme song from the series Outlander on max volume.

Sing me a song of a past that was gone? Seriously odd ringer choice
- Yes and also yes

Not a ringtone but back when it was still on Spotify, I used this as my wake-up alarm

I don't think I need to explain why.

A CLASSIC

Because mine is the Muppets singing Ode to Joy. No further explanation needed.

One of my co-workers is a stoic boomer who's in charge of a huge division of the company. His ringtone is the original Mahna Mahna and it cracks me up every single time.
- I had that one for awhile, but the me-me-me-meeps won me over.

Back when I had a flip phone, I realized that I could use any MP3 as a ringtone. So I used a song from a rhythm game that started with a woman yelling "Attention!"

It was super effective.

If you have a ringtone in public, you are my enemy. You get a pass if it's because you have an on-call type of job for emergencies. But I'll think you're my enemy because I won't know that.

..people still have ringtones?

MULATTO BUTTS!!!

Black and white butts!
- Black ass momma, white ass daddy

You don't have Cat Party?

https://youtu.be/aV41wQpTNSI

Holy shit I was just watching this last night. Frisky dingo was underrated.
- It was Archer before Archer.
I heard it is all about Dog Party now!

IDK but it's funny to see people jump out of their skin when my mother's phone goes off.😆

I had " Diggin on James Brown" by Tower of Power because its a great track, and the friend I assigned it to introduced me to the Music of Tower of Power.

Does the Otamatone count as vocals?

https://youtu.be/gKy1JVbI1_o

Paul, Paul Blart, Mall Cop. Paul, Paul Blart, Mall Cop. Paul, Paul Blart, Mall Cop. Paul, Paul Blart, Mall Cop.

Why not?

Trololo guy. Why? Life is absurd.

My ring tone is the theme from the old Addams Family tv show, and my text notification is the Zelda opening chime.

Does nyancat have vocals?

I mean... does it even really count?

How else am I meant to know who's phone is ringing? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeeBX538QaY

Who is phone?
- But who was phone?

HA-HA-HA-HAAAAA -PCMR

Does this count? My reasoning is: BECAUSE I AM MIGHTY AND YOU ARE WEAK

Irony is an ouroborous that eats its own tail

My normal ringtone doesn't.

But my PagerDuty tone is a barbershop quartet singing that server is on fire. If they're gonna get me outta bed at 3 in G.D.A.M. at least they can sound nice.

Okay, that second half is frkkin hilarous, dude. Are you really taking about computer servers sending SMS alerts that triggers a barbershop quartet ringtone? I still have square-AF default sounds to alert me to my server’s high-priority alerts, it’s just an unusual one so I can ID it by ear better.
- Are you really taking about computer servers sending SMS alerts that triggers a barbershop quartet ringtone?
  Well, I use the PagerDuty app, instead of pure SMS, but otherwise - yeah!

Mine is the version of the Pokémon theme from X/Y because I'm a fucking nerd and proud.

While my phone is always on vibrate, my ringtone is Bananaphone.

Because Impossibear is awesome.