Mushrooms are awesome

Q. How do you tell them apart?
A. Digest and wait 6 hours.
- i know it's a joke but
  A: ask a professional first.
  still unsure?
  smell it, if it smells alright, proceed
  cut off a little piece, put it in your elbow and wait at least 8h
  if all is good, take another little piece, cook it and touch your lips with it, wait a few minutes, put it on your tongue, again wait a few minutes
  if all is good, take another little piece, chew it, wait a few minutes
  if all is good, eat that little piece, and wait at least 8h
  if all is good, eat a bigger piece, wait at least 8h
  if all is good it's probably safe, well, it's not outright poisonous, but if it has any long term effects or only a certain amount gives bad effects then oh boy (like for example psybiocyn might not be very apparent if you only eat a little bit, chomp down an entire shroom though? hope you cooked it well or you're going to be in for an impromptu trip that usually lasts ~6-8h)
  if at any step you noticed a bad thing happening - don't eat it
  this is a general guide and i'm not a professional so like, don't blame the internet stranger if something goes wrong.
  oh also - it doesn't work for the destroying angel, you have to memorise how that mf looks exactly and avoid it like hell - because if you eat as much as half a cap that's where it'll send you, hell, by melting your organs. there is no antidote and the symptoms can start as late as 24h after digestion. the only way we figured out how to keep those who ate it alive is heavy treatments, filtering their blood (liver and kidneys go first), and transplants. whenever i remember the destroying angel exists, i thank whatever god there may be that i just do not like mushrooms in general
  
  I was waiting for a line with "it is now too old for safe consumption"
  
  Oh my fucking god
  It looks just like the edible white button mushroom
  I had heard stories from my parents about people foraging for mushrooms in "the old country" (the Soviet Union), villagers from their province sometimes supplemented dwindling supplies with wild forest mushrooms.
  They said they were invited multiple times to go on mushroom hunts but were afraid of traversing the forests after dusk, and they were glad they refused, because one large family served mushroom soup, and the menti (police/milita) found them all dead.
  Parents, grandparents, children, an entire family generation wiped out by mushroom soup, all dead in their chairs in the dining room.
  
  Great comment.
  I have 60 years worth of morel hunting behind me, yet I still got fooled by a few false morels about 5 years back, and it wasn't pleasant for a couple of days.
  The two are actually very different, so I'm still puzzled about it.

‘If you see other animals eating them they are ok.’
This rule is not true, many animals can eat poisonous fungi with no ill effects.
Well that ruins my plan. Apparently experts make mistakes too. So I guess if society crumbles the only option is to pass it to someone you don't like or is old?
- I hope you don't personally know whoever said that becausr they are a moron and possibly a future Darwin Award candidate.
  That's like one of the early things we teach young kids : "see those bright red berries? They look nice right, and birds love them. Yeah they are poisonous. Don't eat them or you'll die."
  
  Grew up in city. I thought if a deer or bunny eats it is legit. Least in this area. Other regions I'm not touching jack.
- There’s an animal that literally eats poison and Koala bears basically eat the equivalence of a 40.

You can't treat me like a mushroom... keep me in the dark, feed me lies and shit, and expect me to be happy. - Janine, The Handmaid's Tale.

Username checks out.
- You ain't wrong. I like Stamets from Star Trek because first gay main character but also because mushrooms are fuckin cool
  
  Paul Stamets is a real life leading mycologist. The Star Trek character is named after him.
  And yes, mushrooms are super cool.
  
  Isn't he named after: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_Stamets

Aren't mushrooms nutritionally barely a step above grass? Doesn't seem worth the risk.
- Mushrooms are actually incredibly good for you. They are one of the cleanest sources of protein you can get and actually have many incredible health effects. Also, they are fucking delicious. Here's a good link to learn more. 🍄 https://youtu.be/KEa8W0OneH4
- Sure, but if I only cared about nutrition I would get that all in pill form, and then get my calories through fats and oils to have a perfectly balanced diet.
  Mushrooms taste good and that is reason enough to want to eat them.
  
  I'm just saying that if you're hungry in the forest, you're probably better off eating grass than wild mushrooms.
- This is wrong...
  Mushrooms are a nutritious food all around.
- They’re fucking delicious af, if nothing else
  
  A lot of people only ever try the boring white ones and get their flavour from other places. They have no fucking idea!
- They're so tasty, though!
- I've heard a lot of health benefits from mushrooms like Lion's Mane. Mainly, mushrooms you won't find at your supermarket.