An oldie but a goodie

Memes @lemmy.ml

Grian @lemmy.world

1w ago

25 16

42 comments

Meanwhile in Sweden:
Tax office: "This is exactly how much you have earned last year, this is how much tax you paid, this is how much we expect you to owe, or how much we expect that we owe you, do wish to make any corrections? If not please sign with any of the following methods:
Mobile app
Website
Pen and paper
Remember that is you sign early you will get any taxes owed to you payed back earlier!
Have a good day!"
- I would kill a man for taxes that simple. Holy fuck.
  The IRS is a complete shitshow by design, and it’s largely because Intuit et al lobbies (read: bribes) politicians like crazy to keep tax code complicated, so that they can continue to have a business model.
  Send more blue shells; we need ‘em.
  
  Fun fact, it is not uncommon for people to file their taxes on the bus to work through their mobile phone.
- Meanwhile in Norway:
  "If you don't have any corrections literally do nothing and just ignore this lmao"
- I wish we had the same in Germany. Our tax office knows all the data already!
  
  One thing that the Swedish government has realized is that if you want people to pay tax, make it as easy as possible, people hate paperwork, minimize that crap.
  I pay more tax than I need to, just so I won't need to worry about back taxes, I just get a tax return instead, less paperwork and logistics.
  I firmly believe that people don't hate paying taxes, they hate the related paperwork
- In the UK, unless you're self employed, you don't have to do anything at all.
  You might just receive a letter saying HMRC either owes you money or you owe them money.
  
  self employed
  or have child benefit. If you earn over a certain amount, they ask you to refund that benefit through self assestment.
  still tho, it's grand. I once paid too much tax and got back a cheque
- Here in Brazil the government does the same. But it's often wrong...
  It's still helpful, but well, I wish I didn't have to check every little detail.
- You guys live in a utopia. Sounds so nice.
  
  Two years ago I sold some stock I inherited, I had to call the tax office and ask how to deal with it, I got put in a queue, at place 600 something, 10-20 min later I was speaking with an agent who patiently verified my calculations and explained how I would need to actually report and pay my taxes, all of which was easy an straight forward, enter ammount A into box b17 on the second page, and enter ammount B into box b18, then transfer the ammount you owe to your tax account (transfer it to the tax office and use your national ID number as the reference), and sign your tax statement.
  Excluding the call it took me a total of 15 min to verify all numbers and sign the statement.
  A few month later I got a confirmation from the tax office that everything was done.

A day of breathing at 5 cents per breath is worth about 4000 steps a day at 25 cents per step.
- Then I'm better off taking the $0.25 per step
  
  You must have a good disability insurance policy

About $1000 a day breathing and $500 a mile walking. I'll take 5¢ a breath. If you get hurt and can't walk, you're out steps money.
- Plus you breathe more while you're exercising anyways
  
  Put some.panic attacks on top for some sweet sweet monetary gains!

You think you stole my meme, but jokes on you I ALREADY STOLE IT FROM SOMEONE ELSE.
while I'm here i might as well say, you can probably make way more with steps than you ever could breathing, so long as you stay healthy.
I might make it a 9 to 5 marathon each two days or so, invest the money to retire early, and if i ever need more money I can just run again, it's more healthy too v:

Ehh, wouldn't mind paying million in taxes. I'll be making millions a year through step alone since i take around 10k each day.
- I think the joke is more focused on the problem that you'll have to precisely count and report every single one of them.
- That's not true. 10k steps a day is less than a million in a year.
  
  Hold up, you're right! For some reason i multiply what i would get a month by...365, and not 12. Whoops.

Racking up coin while I sleep? Yes please! Good luck with your sleep walking.

Me: 4,6 seconds to make an avarage breath cycle. About 4000 steps on an avarage day.
After 1 year I would get ~343.000 €/$ for breathing or 365.000 €/$ for walking.
So yes it is better to get the money for walking but what if I ever lose the ability to walk but not to breath?
- But what if you ever lose the ability to breathe but not walk?
  
  Then I don't think you're worried about the money anymore

Average healthy adult breathes 12-20 times a minute (those are the numbers we carry around with us in healthcare). So at the upper end, 20b/minx60min/hrx24hr/day gives you $1,440.00 a day. If we count even the impact of your foot while running as steps (does a specific word for that exist? I don't know. In my head a step comes from walking...), a good pace is 3 steps / second. Go for a good 30 minute run, and you get 3st/sec * 60sec/min * 30min for a whopping total of 5400 steps, or $1,350.00. Move around your house while cooking, cleaning, getting the kids/pets/lover where they need to be, and you might end up a bit better off than the breathing. My average steps just around the house add up to 5k-6k, I believe.
The IRS can lick my balls if I'm being paid in cash under the table though.