I will do things to your dinner that will make you never want to eat or oppress me again.

If you’d seen any cooking videos on TikTok you’d know that you’re threatening me with a good meal.

Sure, Steak Diane at the tableside, untampered chickens without green muscle disease, single-income single-family homes, I'm in!

Green muscle disease according to the USDA, check it before chump and clowns remove the info.
Looks like deep breast necrosis due to forced growth and all the crazy breeding.
Did you know that modern factory farmed chickens are so inbred that they are basically clones, the only real genetic differentiation are the sex chromosomes. Transplant of organs without rejection drugs is possible in these chickens.

Or do 1970s cooking, everything in the microwave!

Aspics a crime against humanity

Its just cold soup stock.

Make the economy like the 1950s as well where a janitor could support a wife and 2 kids, own a home, and take several holidays a year on his salary alone

Not to mention a corporate tax rate that would give a modern CEO a stroke.
- I'd rather give a CEO the Luigi treatment than a stroke tbh....
  In Minecraft of course
That is one of their stated goals, but they have absolutely zero plan to achieve it. Idiots still believe the lies for some reason though.
- They'd have to tax the rich at 90% as it was back then
- No one tell them about livable minimum wages, strong unions, and 'socialist' policies. They would rather change their goals than to implement anything that might actually work.
- well, they think they can bring slavery back

Don't forget to slather the whole thing in mayo and peas.

or for better fuck you vibes: mayo and pee
Fuck peas but speaking as a mayo American, mayo kinda slaps. Egg, potato, and pasta salad are pretty excellent side dishes. I buy hard boiled eggs and Costco sized mayo so I can have egg salad on sourdough toast whenever I want.
- I'm not suggesting either are bad when applied properly. But a savory jello with like onions and garlic completely covered in mayo and peas? 🤢

Problem is if that comes to pass. The husband we'll just beat the wife with no consequences.

Sure, but ask an old woman how they dealt with abusive husbands in the good old days.
- Those black-eyed peas? They tasted alright to me, Earl...

There, stuck in the moment with horseradish shrimp pate, my faith was shaken to its core. "Surely no God would allow this" and that's when I came to two Earth shattering conclusions: there is no God and I like being called Shirley.

I think the name Shirley should make a comeback.
- Ethel.

This sounds like the unholy amalgam of a British and Mainer cuisine.

British foods I think gets unfairly criticized.
I come from a south Asian culture that loves to cover rices with all sorts of curries and spices.
But I can appreciate a good fish and chips, Yorkshire pudding, shepherds pie etc.
Not the strange savoury aspics with Mayo and fish of 1950s America.
- In fairness though the Americans have managed to muck up sandwiches by putting sugar in both the bread and the peanut butter.
- It gets ragged on because the British have a decent bit of variety in their culinary history which while standard in the anglosphere is still decent, and then they make beans and toast for two of their three meals. Some regions in the US have the same problem with chili to a lesser extent but at least they try to add some variety by putting it on different things.

People won't stand up against fascism, authoritarianism, nazis or outright criminals in government

But you if threaten to feed them food with horseradish, shrimp in jello and everyone will want to start a revolution.

BRING BACK ASPIC
^{(don't actually tho)}

In case you don't know what they're talking about.

https://www.collectorsweekly.com/articles/the-1950s-most-nauseating-jell-o-soaked-recipes/

wow, that's an excellent read!
now I want to have a 50's-inspired potluck...
- Please make this and share pics.

Carrots, don’t forget carrots in the jello too.

Kill him with butter.

This reminds me, if you haven't seen this dude's Vintage Recipes series, you have been missing out.

https://youtu.be/uaC172yGlxI

Two seconds in and the text, vertical video, and energy level gross me out than any food could possibly do.

The only reason I'd argue with that is that the horseradish would literally kill my better half. You want that back? I'll take it. I'll eat it and be happy.

And casseroles, fucking casseroles. 🤢🤮🤢🤢🤢🤮

Lasagna, baked ziti, scalloped potatos and ham, baked macaroni, enchiladas, tamale pie. Plenty of great casseroles, you're missing out.
- I think they mean the weird 80's casseroles that were like canned vegetables and soup, topped with fish sticks.
What's the problem with those ?