Calm your tits

is there a "imverybadass" community?
- There wasn't.
  I made one.

Those are war corgis.
- I myself have a battle Pug. Come and pet it, Harkkonen.
- wargies?

Typical Murican. Talks a big talk but stays home when their country is being taken over by actual fascists.
- People that act like this voted for the fascists.
  
  Yep they’re the useful idiots who will use their guns to defend tyrant billionaires racists.

If you have to say you're a badass, guess what...
- Real gangsta ass niggas dont flex nuts, cause real gangsta ass niggas know they got em.
  
  And everything's cool in the mind of a gangsta
- I'm reminded of when McDonalds did their Rick and Morty szechuan sauce promotion, and basically no place actually had it.
  It was a big story that Rick and Morty fans harassed workers complaining that the franchise lied to them.
  It got so bad that McDonalds released an app to show where and when stories had the sauce, and announced they'd be selling posters as well. Unfortunately, some locations lied or at least misused the app to say they had the sauce when they didn't.
  So I went to one location with my brother, and we found a line forming outside. The store wasn't allowed to sell the posters till late in the afternoon for some reason, and wouldn't let anyone there for the sauce even enter the building with cashiers actively blocking any Rick and Morty fan from entering, even just looking college age was enough to be refused entry.
  I thought this was ridiculous and just said "Wow, the only thing that'd make this worse is if they didn't have the sauce.", only for the lady guarding the door to tell me that they did indeed not have the sauce, despite the app saying they did.
  There was this guy simping hard for her, mi'lady style, and a bunch of brodudes talking about how they're so Nihilistic and Smart "JUST LIEK RICK!", whole thing was a shit show. He said "Oh yeah, no they don't have the sauce, I asked."
  He was eating cheeseburgers despite not being allowed in, apparently you could have the food brought out to you if you used the app.
  It was fucking cold that day. Still feels like, even false advertising aside, something about this had to be illegal.
  So I said "Fuck this, I'm leaving.", just got into my car, went to Wendy's, ordered chicken nuggets and the most asian sounding sauce they had. Posted one of the only food selfies I've ever done of what I ordered
  "Was going to post me eating the sauce, but I went to Wendy's instead because this store actually has products they claim to offer."
  A friend of mine asked the next day what was up with that post, because Food Selfies or even regular selfies are just THAT out of character for me, and I told him the story.
  He looked at me geniunely impressed, and said "Wait, you valued your own self-respect over the 'cool corporate thing', voiced your dissatisfaction, and calmly left without making a scene or embarassing yourself? If anyone was Rick at this event, it was you"
  I just said "Huh", as I didn't do that to be cool, I was just hungry, wanted to buy nuggets, and didn't get them from a store that lied about having them...
  It was then that my brother, who had been with me when we went to McDonalds spoke up, admitting he didn't even think of what we actually did that day either, we just up and said "Screw you guys, I'm coming home." and said one of the wisest things I'll never forget
  "If you think you're Rick, it means you're Jerry."
- They're the opposite of badass?
  Goodass.
  
  As a power bottom I'm offended you would even consider this idiot to put in that much effort.
  
  Opposite of ass?

His first move would be to throw a hissy fit, collapse as soon as you touched him, feign a heart attack and threaten to sue you .... all while shouting that you're going to be deported
- If he got in your face and you had your hand up and it just barely touched his chest he'd be yelling "CALL 911!! THATS ASSAULT!!!"
  
  Which is why as a person of colour (I'm a big brown Indigenous Canadian) I will never engage with people like this .... because I know that if this happened, there is a high likelihood that the police and courts would take his version seriously.
- “What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.”
  
  When training extensively in unarmed combat, does one employ prosthetics?
  
  That's beautiful ... I haven't been threatened by an online US Marine in years ... I feel honoured ... thanks :)
- Either that or since concealed carry is legal in a ton of states just start firing blindly in every direction and then basically everything you said

Just wild that some losers need to advertise how dumb they are.

Just because I have COPD doesn't mean I won't shit on your floor.
- I need this on a shirt
  
  Yes! And have the Statue of Liberty holding an AR.
  “Just because I have COPD doesn’t mean I won’t shit on your floor.”

We had a saying in my country which goes roughly like this: "It's not the dog that barks which bites"
I'd say it applies here, and I ain't talking about the corgies.
- We have something similar: we'd say someone is "all bark, no bite".
- In Dutch we have that saying too. "Blaffende honden bijten niet." Barking dogs don't bite.

"I'm about to shit my pants from eye contact with strangers so I need clothing with printed letters to convince you otherwise"
- I think a jacket that says "I'll shit my pants if you try to fight me, for reals." would actually be more effective.
  Who wants to get into a fight with someone with squidgy undies?
- If you need an AR-15 to feel safe at Target, the problem is you....
  Or you're a character in Fallout and there are Raiders in the Super Duper Mart
  
  I dunno… have you been to a Target recently? Anyone shopping there at this point is probably either a proud boy or one of the daughters of liberty and probably walking around with 3 guns on them. I’d feel safer around those people with an AR of my own.
  
  I'm a school bus driver and I have one total moron of a coworker who thinks we should all carry guns to protect the buses. He specifically wants to have his AR15 with him, with its magical 40-round mags like that would make the slightest fucking difference after somebody starts off their assault by blasting the driver's seat. I've been pretending I agree with him and encouraging him to suggest this to our (very liberal) school board - since he's above me on the seniority list.
- Yeah. Just do what normal autistic people like me do. Put earbuds in both ears.

Does anyone ever think the guys with anything at all like that on their clothing have forgotten how to be violent? Did we need a reminder? Or does this guy just want to be a typical posturing, aggressive, "alpha male" maga shitstain and be certain no one forgets it?
- Does anyone ever think the guys with anything at all like that on their clothing have forgotten how to be violent?
  I don't think he's forgotten - I think he's old and fat and has mostly lost the ability to be violent, except maybe to his wife. A young, fit man would beat the shit out of him and he knows it. IMHO that's a big reason gun nuts are so into their guns, because it compensates for their physical weakness.
- No, no and yes.

So many assholes in photo

my tits are masculine and quite supple, thanks

Dude in the Gravy Seals
- Meal team 6, specially

I couldn't imagine wearing something like this. Honestly, shirts that say anything are kind of out there for me.
- It’s like a car covered with bumper stickers. It’s mental illness. Unhealthy fear and rage leaking out around the edges and corrupting the facade of decency.
- So what are we looking at for your wardrobe? Pictures only? Plain colors? Maybe like tie dye?
  
  Earth tone plain button ups and jeans, loafers.
  But, I can't think what would possess anyone to wear something vaguely threatening to the general population.
  Like do they look themselves in the mirror and think: decent?
  
  I'm with him. My buddy calls me a cartoon character because I wear the same outfit everyday. I have multiple pairs of it though.
  Black t-shirts (mostly), some other earth tones. All solid.
  I'm all for comfort and making shit easy.
  
  Not op but pretty much everything I wear is just a plain color clothing item that looks ok and feels comfortable/fits well. It’s cool to focus on fashion, but for me that ends if you’re covering yourself in industry brands, supporting fast fashion/dumb luxury, or placing people above or below each other based on the perceived value of the cloth and metal they choose to wrap themselves in
  
  …I need to up my tie dye game.
  
  Mines mostly plain color shirts. Some plaid. I have a few graphic tshirts from when I was younger and that people bought me when they were on vacation. Not really a fan of wearing those around though.

That protruding blob on the back of his neck isn't fat, it's actually a bonus concealed weapon slot.

I'LL CRANK MY HOG TO THIS, BROTHER, AROOOO

These are the same people who own a big lifted truck and then put a giant sticker on the window that says “CHEVY” just in case you or they forgot what they are driving.
- Some version of a window-wide US flag with the angry eagle, a Gadsden snake sticker, a gun maker sticker, an AR silhouette variant sticker with a juvenile anti-lib slogan like “my AR says fuck your lib tears” and of course the NRA sticker and a military service branch sticker.
  
  That and or a quote from the Bible or the constitution.
- And Calvin pissing on a Chevy logo
  
  I like the message the Calvin sticker sends: "I am childish but have an old man's bladder."
- Maybe that's why Ford does what they do, to boost ego.

Somebody forgot to center their edgy graphic.

What if someone threatens his corgis tho
- Dude I'll jump in to protect the corgis
  
  You've never met a corgi huh? They don't need help they'll nip the shit out of people they like and downright attack people they don't. The queen had literal warnings provided to people who entered her residence because they bit so many worlds leaders.

Gravy Seal. Proclaiming what a badass he is but probably starts wheezing just making it to the table from the Cracker Barrel parking lot.

If only these people could recognize a tyrant when they see one.
- Two have so far!

It’s entirely possible that his brain didn’t forget how to be violent but it’s clear his body did. So this is basically a billboard indicating, “if you sneak up on me and restrict my arms, you can probably find my concealed weapon.”

Don't forget for one second just because I'm not a graphic designer doesn't mean I don't get constantly told I fucked up centered justification.

We call this "StrongMan-Posturing", this guy never experienced violence.
I remembered a MGTOW guy by the name "Undead-Chronic" (do any of you remember him ?) He chickened out the moment FBI showed up at his door😂

This reminds me of a buddy I used to have. He wore jackets exactly like this and even had two little dogs. He was a Vietnam vet and did, in fact, kill a whole bunch of people during the war. Something he never forgave himself for.
One time I asked him what that was like. He thought for a minute and said, "When you have your weapon trained on someone, for a split second you have the power of God in your hands. You get to decide if that person lives or dies. Nobody should have that kind of power."
He was a character but a good dude overall.

Peak American cringe

You're doing exactly what he is asking you not to.

Positive spin, he bought it from a pro-LGBTQ+ thrift store to support local causes in his area. I swear I've seen similar jackets at said thrift stores.

Hell yeah brother, fuckin' hardcore

The pair of cute corgis really sells it
- Can confirm. Our corgis are significantly more dangerous than I am. Doubly, so if they think you might try to clip their nails.
  
  Angry loaves of bread!

This is some serious THE_PACK vibes
- DON'T THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE I'M PEACEFUL THAT I FORGOT HOW TO CRANK MY HOG

Now that I am older, my eyesight isn't what it used to be. I could still hit that target at 100 yards with iron sights. Meal Team 6 wannabe tacticool moron wouldn't last thirty seconds in a firefight.

Honestly this could be self aware satire.

Regina's love corgis!
- What's a love corgi, who is Regina and how are hers involved?
  
  Oops!

So he didnt forget to be violent yet he is peaceful? So which is it, is he violent or peaceful? Those are antithesis to one another, sounds like he is just brain broken.
- He is peaceful but didn't forget how to be violent and can be violent when need be. Makes perfect sense to me.
  
  Knowing how to be violent doesnt make you peaceful. Makes zero sense to me. Also, just saying you are peaceful doesnt make you peaceful.
  You think this bro is peaceful? lmao 🤡

I gotta get this guy into my university class. His dogs, too!