Is this thing on?
I hallucinate birds, cats, and children all the time, and I hate it when they actually show up at work.
I will never read the card in the Balatro logo as an "A"
The cheapest way to get more food at a fast food restaurant is to actually tip for takeout
The easiest way to not fall down a slippery slope is to not step on it.
I have seen the face of Joy - it is two magpies building a nest together
Craving your warmth
There's nothing I can do about my urge to protect.
When you've never really had a home town, every town's a home
If too much weightlifting is bad then why did god make it so fun
You know you've made it when you wake up at 6AM to your dog licking your face instead of yet another ringtone you can't stand anymore.
TIL my standard coffee is akin to diesel to the average consumer
I got promoted.
I like to flip onto my bed, but then my glasses threaten to fly off, but luckily I can also wiggle my ears and pull my glasses far enough back to keep my glasses secured when I flip onto my bed.
I have slowly turned myself into my own therapist
noodles
It's not that I want to be annoying, it's just that you're too sweet for this horrible world and I feel an insatiable urge to protect you.
If you didn't wear your heart on your sleeve, it wouldn't be stepped on so often.
It's snowing sideways above green grass
It's raining a lot out there,
