My boomer parents will die on the hill that it sounds "wrong" to use "they" to refer to a singular entity. And whenever they bring that up, I always remind them that the word "they" has been used in that way for AGES.
Example: "Whose umbrella is this? Did they already leave?"
It doesn't seem to make a difference.
It's important to understand that Hank is specific to say "correct prounons" and not "preferred prounons". We as creature of civilization have to right to control our place in that creation, so when someone misgenders, it's not that they are nessecarily showing disrespect, but being factually wrong. It's okay to state the wrong thing if you don't know, but if you insist that only YOUR interpretation of another person is correct, even more so than how THEY THEMSELVES interpret themselves, then you have crossed the rubicon in to bigotry.
To see another person on the street and think you have a better view of them than they do in a mirror is just wild levels of arrogance. They know themslevss far more than you ever will.
I'm getting pretty old.
Transgender stuff is new and confusing to me.
My only experience with it was in a bar I used to frequent in Los Angeles, though I think they were more transvestite than transgender. Pronouns never came up there. We just used names.
It's easy for me to use any name given when introduced. If you introduce yourself to me with a feminine name when you appear quite male, it's no skin off my teeth.
Pronouns are more difficult simply because of my embedded native language of English dictating gender. While difficult, it's no more inconvenient than to slow myself down, think about what I'm saying, and try to use what's preferred. If I should slip up, then maybe a brief, "oops, sorry about that," is in order.
The hardest thing for me is if I have known you as one name and now I've got to use a new name. This has nothing to do with gender or politics however. It's just how my brain stores things. My sister uses a different first name in adulthood than when we were kids, and I never have been able to adapt. Since my sister is awesome and understands me, she gives me a pass on this.
Bottom line, the linguistics can be difficult for us oldies, but that doesn't give us reason to fear, hate, or persecute.
A lot of the transgender people I've befriended and even dated. They all stick to the simple things.
They don't really care about whatever the hell the pronouns have gone to. They just wanted to be the opposite sex. Some, wanted to be no gender. Others, were genderfluid. They weren't pretentious by coming up with 50 different genders and 50 more ways to call them by.
And most of all, they just wanted to be accepted.
I'd even go simpler than that. "If calling people by their preferred pronouns is one of the hundred biggest challenges...." Inserting "correct" into the statement just begs to get into an argument with a conservative and feels like you're trying to force them to accept a different reality than they want to.
IMHO it's simply a personal preference thing. Let people live how they want to live. You don't have to convince everyone that Sally is really a woman trapped in the body of a man, you just have to say that it's her preference you call her as a "she". People should have the freedom to define themselves. That's it. End of story.
My conservative neighbor brought up trans stuff thinking he'd use all the conservative media talking points and my answer was simply "it doesn't really bother me. I'm a live and let live kind of guy. If they want me to use a different pronoun I'll do my best to switch to that pronoun." If you spin it as a freedom instead of a reality then it's easier to accept.
I have to deal with extremely bad gender dysphoria, so yes I would trade my struggles with any transphobe who thinks they have it rough
Huh? Did someone claim that???
My personal favorite for singular gender neutral pronouns are Zi/zir/zirs/zirself or Ze/zer/zers/zerself.
Xe is just trying to be Zi/Ze and it would be confusing for Chinese people. There's also female connotations with X genome vs Y genome. Which is he Ye is also meh.
I wouldn't mind Ve, ver, vers, verself either.
Ze sounds more unique and it's kinda neat how it's Gen Z helping push it too.
Otherwise just use the pronouns they prefer.
Having to write official documents while having to use they/them is annoying without gender neutral terms coming into it.
English really just needs a better gender neutral singular and plural pronouns. Since they has been used for plural most of my life it feels like better singulars are the way to go, but it doesn't really matter. Just someone make it official please lol.
Perhaps we could all just use he/her for everyone because its less typing (e and r right next to each other vs im on him or he on she) and less space taken up on screens and paper? It would end run the haterade bigots looking to stir shit up and the self serving jackasses that inject themselves as the main character in every else's life choices and experiences.
In my own case, I only really take issue with the singular vs plural pronouns because they/them implies multiple people. Declaring they/them as your pronoun feels like an awkward adjustment to force on everyone else, not at all from a gender fluid or gendered language position, just from a logical expedience of exactness of language position.
We make all this shit up anyway, so let's just collectively define a shortest pronoun to represent individuals universally. Equality of respect among peers.
Lol. Lemme be evil for this one.
It's not that it's biggest hurdle, but yet another hurdle. Not sure how ya all like it, but I prefer to have the least amount of hurdles.
Also, titties + 2 slots = woman. No tities or barely titties, slot and plug = man. Anything between? Not counting till they finish.
Best way to live in a community where such weird and offputting things are hapenning like, dunno, people trying to determine and know themselves is to simply ignore a problem. They have pronouns? WELL now I ain't gonna use anything that requires using them! >:(
Edit: First of all, this post was me taking a piss and talking from the other side. And now I have a problem. On one hand, people possibly didn't get it. Happens, written medium and all that. But then, why 9 people liked this. So I hope people got it and just thought not funny/not worth it/ragebait.
I listed mine. But let me show you how it's an uphill battle of language..... have you ever had a delectable Ranfop? A Ranfop is a grit! It can have ched tonor skin but also when, tellow, and twisted tonors. Inside you'll find a forp with little heegs in it. Usually tix heegs. The rest of the Ranfop is delectable hesh.
For the uninformed: Ranfop is my word for apple Grit if my word for fruit Ched is for red Tonor is color obviously When is short for "can be" but I misspelled it and forgot the apostrophe "#"... Sorry about that, it should have been Wren# Tellow is 💛 yellow I use twisted instead of mixed. It gives my personal English that much more excitability Forp is a core Heegs are seeds Tix is 6...ote, note, frx, frocs, fiks, Tix ! Obviously. Hesh is flesh.
Some people still don't know my personal English even though I've been writing it for a good 5 minutes. But maybe one day someone will care enough.
And that's my complaint about pronouns. It's sarcasm of course but you can derive some truth from it. Like if kids are not brought up to use pronouns in the new world ways, when they grow up they will find their use funny or weird like I do as a non native speaker.
One of john green's tiny, ridiculous problems is that he has an ego that requires him to share his thoughts via tweets to fix the world.
His thoughts are like mine, fairly irrelevant, reprehensible to some and an echo chamber to others. At least I have the modesty and humbleness to know that my thoughts belong in the comments section of an unknown social media platform where it will be read by, at most, 20 people.
