The straight pride flag looks gay AF

If I saw this, I'd immediately assume it's a variation on the bi pride flag.
- "Nice flag. So you fellas go both ways?"
- Missing the purple, though.
  Having only two colors, clearly delineated, makes the flag worthless as a means of conveying anything, so they had to broadcast what it means with big, braindead-obvious symbols.
  Frankly, that definitely looks like a straight pride flag, in that it's boring, binary, with absolutely zero sense of style, subtlety, or iconography.
  
  It looks like a flag for transphobic bisexuals who only date cis people who fall firmly within the gender binary.

Cute couple.
- "So which one of you is the 'girl'?"
  
  The one on the right, don't you see the flag?

The two guys holding up the straight pride flag look like they unhappily fuck their wives at home once every quarter to prove that they don't love the cocks that they shamefully suck every weekend.

They don't look very proud.

Isn't being proud of your sexuality mostly a response to being shamed by bigots for your sexuality? Like: parts of society look down on my sexuality? Well fuck you, I'm proud of it! If you're not being shamed at all, isn't a bit weird to be proud of such things? As if you did anything to become a heterosexual. No one cares, nor should they.
- Yeah, that is the whole point. The whole point is not "I am proud of who I am attracted to", the point is "I am proud of being open about who I am attracted to despite the bigots and social challenges".
  Which is why there is no "straight pride", "blond pride", or "high school student pride". There is no glory in doing something that is statistically speaking, completely devoid of interest...
  
  Yeah, but the more we demonize normal people, the more interesting they become.
  
  There is no glory in doing something that is statistically speaking, devoid of interest...
  Wait, I thought this was about being proud of standing up to bigots?
  Is it about being a statistical anomaly and special, or about being a progressive activist?
  Cuz I'll tell you what pride month is to me, as a straight man. Pride month is one of many placative gestures performed by corporations in order to manipulate my empathy into buying their products. It's a nice set of makeup that corporations get to wear while you go out and suffer the consequences. You, as someone who is a part of the LGBTQ+ community, should be painfully aware of the damaging effects that corporate usage of the pride month aesthetic has had on public perception of the people in that group.
  Yet, here you are. Concerned about establishing why you're more fucking special than straight people.
- Yup. This is essentially the same as people suddenly screaming about "WHITE PRIDE!!!!" in response to things like Black Live Matter.
  The entire point is a minority not letting the majority shame or otherize them. The the majority freaks out and responses with "ME TO BUT BETTER THAN YOU DID IT!".
  It's pathetic.
- I agree with your statement, but I would like to point out that "as if you did anything to become a heterosexual" is... yikes. That implies the LGBTQ+ community is not born how they are and have to do work to become lesbian, gay, bi, etc.
  Diction is important; while that doesn't ruin the overall argument for me because I am an ally, I don't think that's something to say going forward because it's very easy to latch onto and discredit the argument as a whole.
  
  I actually meant that as: as if you did anything to become a heterosexual/homosexual/any-kind-of-sexuality.
- So your saying I can be proud to be white then?
  
  You can be proud about anything.
  Most people are proud to be useful idiots, for example.

You're not wrong but all the gays I know have way better taste than that abomination.

Looks like two guys holding it up. Kind of ironic
- I assume this is some sort of mockup. I don't mean to be judgemental based on a picture, but those guys both 100% love dick. Sometimes it's just obvious.
  
  I don’t have the gaydar I guess but I do like the idea of a straight flag that can be brought to lgbt+ events and parades etc

They look like two Russian brothers who have bought a third tier football club purely as some sort of elaborate tax evasion ruse.
- Also they love just hanging out in the locker room for some reason

No women in sight 🤔
- But they're at least standing nice and far apart to make sure no parts of them accidentally touch and turn gay.
- Ain't no women proud of being straight. "I have to put up with dudes to get off 💪" - nobody ever
  
  These people are douches but that's a really toxic attitude
  
  Go speak for yourself maybe?
- They're probably at home or out shopping.

I always thought it would be funny if “s” was added to “lgbtq” for straight.
Then when someone has a problem with “lgbtqs”, you can be like “you’re not straight?”
- 2-Spirit already took the S, lol.
  
  *in Canada (and perhaps parts of the US? not sure)
- Why is this funny?
  
  Makes it really easy to defeat their "you include everyone but us" argument and call homophobes gay at the same time.
  
  Like when a homophobe says they hate lgbtqs, you can respond as if they are saying they hate straight people.

So, I have a few issues with the design.
Setting aside for a second how dumb this shit is, the design has some very questionable decisions.
First I couldn't care less about the "man" and "woman" signs, they're linked, and gold, which I assume is some reference to marriage? I've never understood the symbology of those symbols. I think they're tacky and archaic. I don't inherently have an issue with their use in the design. My main issues with the design are with the colors. That's not a super great shade of blue or pink. On top of that, the "man" symbol is almost entirely on the pink side, and the woman symbol is almost entirely on the blue side. Additionally, representing a boy as blue and girl as pink is pretty questionable as well. I would have expected something like this in the 80's or 90's, but today? What? It's just strange.
Why a slash? Why is it going from top left to bottom right? I have to many questions. It's like there was no thought in the brain of whomever put this together, and they didn't ask anyone to review it before having it made.
Now, flipping the coin here, what exactly do straight people have to be proud of? I'm straight, and I don't know. Is it pride in the decisions that we've made which facilitate the perpetration of humanity? Is humanity really something we should be proud of and continue to perpetuate? We've committed an untold number of unspeakable horrors to eachother, animals, and nature. Are we perpetuating the species so we can continue to rape and kill the planet and eachother? Either figuratively or literally? Don't get me wrong, humans have achieved some remarkable things despite our obvious issues; but still, does any of that outweigh the horrors we've inflicted? I'm not so sure that perpetuating humanity is anything to be proud of.
Are we proud of our heritage? Our lineage? The long genetic lines of aforementioned horrible people? Who enslaved others and called it progress? Who committed all those previously mentioned terrible things?
So historical pride is questionable, and pride of purpose is questionable.... What's left? Just being proud of who you are? Pride in being a human who is straight? What for?
I don't understand. I have no pride for who I am naturally, and who I am attracted to. I have no pride in the things my race, gender, or sexual orientation has done. The straights have been responsible for pretty much all the pain and suffering of everyone who is "deviant".
I don't know why anyone would be proud of that.
- I think people like this believe that non-straight folks have an agenda to make straight folks feel ashamed of being straight. As in - if you're proud of being gay, that means you must think being not-gay is a bad thing. And so they feel attacked. It's so brainless and reactionary.
  Or white, or Christian, or insert whatever not-really-persecuted-but-thinks-they-are group here
  
  Imagine being so fragile and insecure that when someone else expresses pride in themselves, you feel threatened.
  
  Yeah I think that is the bottom line. I am straight as a ruler and absolutely do not give a flying fuck who has sex with who, it's not my business and I cannot imagine being threatened by it, as long as it's not me why would I care? If you are threatened by the existence of people who love other people there is something deeply wrong.
  Pride is literally one of the seven deadly sins, I'd think Christians would want to avoid it.
  On the flag design, I think it makes sense, designed by straight guys and looks like it was designed by straight guys. People would get suspicious if it looked fabulous. I do actually kinda like those symbols - they are old, from the 1700s, used originally for describing plants so there is one for hermaphrodite as well. One of my kids is a geneticist and their charts use a triangle for men & circle for women, the arrow and cross ones are better designs IMO.
- Fundamentally, we agree. Today we have reached the deepest pit of cringe.
  But your initial criticism of the design undercuts what might've been the only progressive aspect of the design: the fact that the male is on the pink side upsets foundational sexism: guys can be pink, and girls can be blue.
- I bet these are the same people that say "All lives matter" or "white lives matter".
  
  To be blunt:
  All lives do matter.
  Nobody needs to be reminded of that.
  We do, however, need to remind some of the less intellectually developed people that black lives, do indeed, matter. Which they do, they always have, and always will. While this is a subset of everyone's life mattering, it does not and should not imply that the lives of non-black persons do not matter, it should only serve as a reminder that black lives do matter.
  The problem is that people get so fragile about being left out that excluding them from a movement because nobody ever needed reminding that their lives "matter", causes them to get offended that someone else is getting special attention that they do not deserve, and have no right to impose themselves upon. Saying "all lives matter" in response to the BLM movement is, in my mind, a form of what aboutisms which is toxic and diminishes the point of BLM. It's ignorant and short sighted.

They totally finger blasted each other after this
- if you fuck under the straight flag it's like super no homo
  
  That's where the no homo chant comes in.
  
  Only if you wear the flag like a cape.

That's not the straight flag. The straight flag is horizontal black and white stripes and has been around for about 20 years.
The ally flag is the straight flag with a rainbow "A" on it. If you've been to Pride, you have probably seen flags or pins with that design.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Straight_flag#:~:text=A%20flag%20composed%20of%20alternating,originating%20in%20the%20early%202000s.
- I'm straight and I disavow this flag because it's fucking boring.
  
  I'm on the asexual spectrum and I would also like to complain about our flag. The single purple stripe does not make up for the white and grey.
  Fortunately I'm biromantic so I'm using the bisexual flag because at least it's pretty.
  I'm also agender, that flag is really rare to see in the wild, but I'd like to complain about it too.
  I don't get to have a sexuality, a gender, or a cool flag. How unfair!
- I know, right! Two words into Google would have saved them this embarrassment.
- Looks like some old school prison jumpers.
  
  AKA the hamburglar's costume
  
  Like "being a bitch is gay, being on the other side of relationship is straight"? I mean, checks out
- Sounds like all of those are proposed by bigots.

Alex Jones and Andrew Tate have seen much better days...

I hate flags
- God hates flags
  
  Nationalism is unnatural

NEWSFLASH!!! People scared of homosexuality are actually scared that they'll become homosexuals. That's right, they're so insecure with their own sexuality, they're concerned that by allowing homosexuality, they'll be the first to succumb to gayness.
- Ew! Get the gay away! I don't want to catch it from this cute boi.

That's not a "straight pride" flag, that's a "doubling down on our anti-LGBTQ+ agenda because they dare to defy us with their own flag" flag. I'm straight, that flag does not represent me, it represents bigoted fucks. There are already several flags for that.
- "There are already several flags for that."
  Yes. And in fact, a couple of those flags plagiarize ancient Hindu symbols... See if you can find which (hint: it's not the lotus...)
  
  When I learned about that one is when I figured out all symbolism of anything good is doomed to stray from it's original meaning. Fools and assholes will ultimately adopt them in an attempt to appear more credible on the surface, when people start figuring them out, they associate that symbol with that behavior, and it's game over. They do it to flags, religious totems, words, anything that might be able to grant them a benefit-of-the-doubt buff for a while.

Gold?
You idiots! There's nothing gayer than gold!

I didn't know we had one
- The one I knew of was monochrome
  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Straight_flag
  
  Those flags look like shit imo. That article is quite something though
  In 2019, the American organization Super Happy Fun America led a straight pride parade in Boston, in the United States, in August of the same year
  Super Happy Fun America
  Super Happy Fun America (SHFA) is a Massachusetts-based right-wing political organization. SHFA and its leaders are known for their ties to white nationalism and the far-right
  That name and logo combined with that description, wow
  In 2021, a social media trend called "super straight" emerged on TikTok on 21 February and later spread to other websites like 4chan, Reddit and Twitter. Supporters stated that "super straight" was a new sexuality describing heterosexuals who would never have a sexual relationship with transgender people. Its originator said he created the term because he was tired of being called transphobic.
  From TikTok to 4chan. Future is now, old man.
  
  Oh I didn't realise we were testing our contrast today.
  
  It looks Breton
- "We" didn't. I hope you don't identify with the people needing this flag.
  
  "We" meaning straight people.

I though the official Straight Pride flag was in black and white (no grey areas or ambiguity), with a male symbol on top of a female symbol (depicting the hierarchy of dominance the sorts of people who would have such a flag consider the only acceptable order)
- the official Straight Pride flag
  As the interim CEO of Straight I can assure you that no such thing exists because having a flag is, according to the board of directors, "pretty gay". I refer you to the OP should you require further proof.
- I endorse the T-Shirt Hell version, which is a cute little arched rainbow, in greyscale.

If the "stop calling me a homo" kid was a flag

Quite a pull to not use straight lines on a straight flag.

Why are they both bald
- Aerodynamics
- They're too manly for hair.
- Follicular testosterone sensitivity.
- It is of too fucking gay, bro. I went of too fucking gay at age of nineteen, and now look upon me. There is nothing. My head is barren.
  EDIT: Sorry, I thought this was a child comment beneath the one about it the flag looking gay. Then there was something about them looking Russian in there and it amalgamated into whatever the fuck I posted.

That flag is a horrible design, but how does something "look gay?"
- There's (unintentionally?) lots of symbolism here that reads as lgbtq. The male symbol being in the pink area, the female symbol being in the blue area, the male symbol has its erect phallus arrow pointing away from the female symbol, the parts of both symbols that are the same (the rings) are the only parts that touch each other, the overlapping rings create a shape that's very evocative of a butt, the background color field is at a steep angle making it very much not straight with the horizon of the flag and not straight with the orientation of the gendered symbols.
  Plus in this particular photo it's two men holding the same flag which is supposed to be representing a sexuality, and the phallus of the male symbol points right at one of the men, and the material of the flag looks very satiny which is considered a very effeminate look.
  All in all, it's harder to find symbolism here that actually reads as straight rather than lgbtq.
  
  All in all, it’s harder to find symbolism here that actually reads as straight rather than lgbtq.
  It's much harder to come up with something genuinely more gay. This is possibly the gayest image I have ever seen.
  
  Thanks.
- No shade intended but by any chance are you Gen Z or younger?
  If so, there's some ingrained toxic social more context you might not understand because you grew up in a better society than we did.
  But if you're genuinely asking...
  Anything that acknowledges women exist? Gay
  Anything that recognizes men in relation to others instead of as the default? Believe it or not, gay
  Anything that involves sharing? Gay
  Pink? Gay
  Blue? Also gay
  Pink and blue? Liberace
  Diagonal lines? Gay
  The male/female Mars/Venus signs? Gay
  The Venus sign on a blue background? Lesbian
  Mars sign on a pink background? Flaming gay
  Two men standing near each other? friends of Dorothy
  Two men holding a flag together? Gay
  The way the one guy is pinching the corner? Super fucking gay
  Wearing a teal shirt? Gay
  Wearing a yellow tie? Gay
  I could keep going but I think you might get the picture.
  Edit: formatting
  
  I still have relatives that say "ugh that's gay" to mean "I don't like that".
  I don't speak to these relatives anymore.
  
  I lost it at Liberace. Also apparently this is the official colour of Liberace
  
  Nope. 67 and doing my best since high school to be inclusive in my thinking.
  I guess I just don't get how anyone other than a toxic fuck or at least a thoughtless stereotyper could say that most of what you point out of indicates gayness.
  Someone else went through a "symbolic analysis" that helps me see some of it.
- I'm 40, and when I first opened the image, I was overwhelmed with how hilariously gay it looked. But not in a bad way - almost at if it were made unironically for lgbtq.
  The other person that replied to you with a lengthy list is spot on.
- Except for white its the same general colors as in the trans flag, maybe thats why people associate it with lgbt+ flags
- Guess you’re not a 90s kid!
  
  Hah, definitely not! 67 on my last birthday.
- The gay community adopted and have used pastels in messaging for decades, and this flag has pastels in spades.
  It's not 100% of course; judging anything by sight alone is fraught*, but pastels in advertising is a pretty decent indicator.
  (*) are you certain that's a Nazi Swastika, or is that skinhead Hindu?
  
  Thanks for putting exactly the nuance I was looking for! Symbols are important, but diversity disappears when we use symbols as a substitute for reality.
- Yeah, I don't get it. I like pink but I hate this flag! Straight guys don't really need a flag, most of them advertise it enough. I'm straight and I find most the jokes distasteful.
- How does a blue curtain look blue?
- Things look gay by being well designed in my experience.

I'm confused at why an LGBTQ community wouldn't take the strategy of forceful adoption. Mostly under the point that they offer a home to all. However, it would negate any exclusion arguments against those communities.
Take your adversaries symbols and make them yours kinda thing. A Yankee Doodle approach.
"Where's muh straight flag?"
"Right here sparky."
- The straight flag has been around for quite a while. It's black and white horizontal stripes. The ally flag is the straight flag with a rainbow "A" on it.
  These guys in the picutre didn't bother doing any research evidently and started flying the wrong flag.
- Wait, what exactly are you saying we should do?
  
  The straight flag was made by homophobes... above comment was proposing that we hijack it and make it part of the lgbtq+ community, fly it in pride parades, etc., the same way we turned "queer" from a slur into an identity label.
  
  Yes, please elaborate. I can't tell if I agree or not.

Let's beat them up for kissing girls. Who am I kidding. These guys can't get self-respecting women.

Bigot pride!

What would be a good straight flag that also follows vexillology best practices?

This is what you get when you order a bisexual pride flag off Temu

Yeah... they could've done a better job there.

The one from decades ago was fine and kind of funny actually - it was the gay one but grayscale. This one is shoplifting the trans colors. Also only chuds will ever fly this, so at least it functions as a do-not-interact signifier.