what stage of capitalism is it when you barely even advertise the name of your product and just try to hide behind excuses? (the other side is the same but in French)

Fictitious Capital

Also (trigger warning: sexual assault) I'm sure we're all going to be surprised to learn what Lipton middle-management has been up to in Kenya

You know those white kids who overzealously scream about white people with dreads? This is the tea they drink.

Remember that Mr Beast campaign about planting trees that every YouTuber hopped on? I wonder what happened with that. I wonder how many trees were actually planted with care and not some shmuck throwing an acorn into the dirty.

Yeah but that's one teabag. It comes in a cardboard box with 200 of it's friends.

Also what kind of trees? Cocoa trees? Tea trees? On plantations? That you force the locals to work at as a form of "cheap" labour?

This is just so monstrous. I don't know what marketing executive came up with this idea of trying to greenwash their plantations like this, but they deserve to be hit by a bus. Absolutely soulless. This is the sort of thing that would be considered "too unrealistically cruel and inhumane" for a movie satirising how capitalism does exactly this sort of shit all the time.

Canadian neo-colonialism (with a liberal face)

If you write in French on the other side of the packaging, you can sell the same product for a higher price.