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mutual_aid @hexbear.net
allthetimesivedied [they/them, she/her] @hexbear.net

I know the person who runs the accounts KodyGerba/BaileyDee IRL, and they're lying to you

He isn’t even homeless. He lives in an RV or something in his girlfriend’s mom’s driveway and does nothing but smoke fetty and suck all the air out of this community, making it harder for people like me who actually fucking need money. And he sends his girlfriend out to collect recycling and panhandle all night, alone. He’s an absolute piece of shit to her. He is an absolute piece of shit. Stop sending him money.

It makes me so fucking angry how I have to beg and plead to get sent anything, while he’s apparently getting sent hundreds of dollars. I remember once one of his posts was even pinned for a while. What the fuck?

P.S. Technically BaileyDee is his girlfriend’s account, but of course he doesn’t let her use it. You can tell it’s him posting.

24 comments

  • If you have any evidence to your claims, then send it to the mod team. That way we can avoid doxxing people's sensitive information. We can't just take you at your word when it can mean the difference between someone starving or not.

    And if he's actually sending Bailey out by herself to panhandle at night, that's still indicative of financial distress. It also implies that there may be some domestic problems in their relationship which we are not equipped to address here.

    • And if he's actually sending Bailey out by herself to panhandle at night, that's still indicative of financial distress.

      Yeah, he’s buying fentanyl.

      • Do you think having a drug addiction disqualifies you from receiving mutual aid? Attacking someone's credibility over that is pretty fucked up, especially considering your own history. I tried to stop people from saying heinous shit like "they're sucking all the air out of the community" about you when you were struggling with addiction and here you are saying just that about someone else.

        Poverty is a disease and pushes people to drugs as a coping mechanism. You should know that better than most.

        And if he is forcing Bailey to do that shit, then instead of attempting to cut off her source of mutual aid you should be trying to help her escape from an exploitative relationship instead of trying to sabotage someone's form of assistance because you feel like you deserve that aid more.

    • I don’t know what the hell constitutes proof here. I know him IRL, we are part of the same social milieu and I know this information first-hand. The exact how and why and such, I can’t go into detail about because of reasons (very serious reasons).

  • I've always emphasized the mutual in mutual aid. People who post across our forums, I recognize them as not just charity cases but one of our number. Even someone like Mahmoud has done an AMA and come back to post. So in my book you don't have much to worry about.

    Also I would be careful of leveling the accusation of "sucking the air out of the community". You've been on the other side of that. I've noticed suspicious patterns in the accused account, which is usually a need that can be met with $0.25 a day, and little if any posting otherwise (see previous paragraph). So consider it not something that would pull the resources of a contributor like me.

    BTW I still owe you a square Chinese takeout meal (which I have no hangups around because I'm employed again), PM me when you particularly need it.

    • I've always emphasized the mutual in mutual aid. People who post across our forums, I recognize them as not just charity cases but one of our number. Even someone like Mahmoud has done an AMA and come back to post. So in my book you don't have much to worry about.

      I feel shitty for how as of late I’ve posted little else but mutual aid requests. Life has been…blah.

  • I brought up some issues with them with the mods recently, but didn't feel comfortable naming names, I didn't want to assume too much, but if other people are coming forward with issues about them, I'll share what I said then here. They have messaged me on paypal asking for money after I explicitly asked them to not message me directly like that, ignoring my boundaries. Additionally, a few hours after I had sent them money to deal with their issues, they made a post here asking for help for the same issue I just sent them money to fix.

    I've been trying to just chalk this up to communication issues and them being in a desperate situation, but something about the way they ask for money here has rubbed me the wrong way. Sorry if this comment breaks the rules, but if others have problems with them, I think it is important to discuss this as a community. Mutual aid groups can be destroyed by refusing to address and discuss situations like this.

  • If someone is scamming, that’s really upsetting I don’t support that at all. But I’d rather focus on helping those who are truly in need than spreading hate. Let’s keep supporting each other.

    • So in other words ignore the problem and let it keep happening?

      • There's a big difference between ignoring a problem and discussing it and bringing information to light. Like I said below, we shouldn't start witch hunts, because that only ends up hurting mutual aid groups. But that doesn't mean the problem is being ignored. You bringing it to everyone's attention will help a lot, and if they are just scamming people, and get a reputation as a scammer here, they'll slink away to try and exploit someone else, like scammers always do.

24 comments