22h ago

My girlfriend brother got made at me for saying video games aren’t a hobby

My girlfriend is really close with her siblings and every second week of the month she always has all of them over to have dinner at our apartment so they can get together. It’s a large group of 5 other siblings so it gets loud but it’s all fun and they’re very nice people and we all get along. Her brother is really cool and builds computers for fun and I think that takes a level of knowledge that I don’t really posses so I’m like very happy for people who do things like that and I do see building computer is a hobby because it takes skill determination and a lot of time to do and there’s a healthy component behind I think. I think I see it as a puzzle.

He got upset at me though when we were talking about some computer parts, he was saying how one computer part is running very hot that it burns the cables and breaks the computer and even though this happens he says it’s rare and he still wants one. I asked him how that happens and he said it’s usually because the parts are put under a lot of pressure when they’re being used and sometimes they get really hot and they break and he said it’s usually because of a video game. I laughed a bit and said something like “breaking a computer over an video game lol” but I don’t think he got it and he said “well that’s the whole point of the parts to play video games.”

I laughed a bit but he wasn’t laughing and looked like a said something rude. I apologized for not knowing about the computers and he said it was okay. I told him that I only play Mario kart every now and then and that it’s my favorite game because me and my gf play it every now and then and that’s when he said “that’s a good hobby for you both” and I got confused and said “it’s not a hobby just a bit of fun.” He said hobbies are supposed to be fun and that’s why games are hobbies because they take a lot of time and energy. I frankly disagree with this so I told him “people put time and effort in work but work isn’t a hobby” and he got mad again and said “you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I think I upset him over the computer parts so I tried to make it up to him by saying “I think building computers is a hobby and that takes time and effort” but then he said “don’t patronize me I know what you’re doing” so things got really sour. He left the dinner table and went to watch tv.

After driving him home my sister told me that he spent a lot of money like thousands on online card games and that it was a sensitive topic for him. I didn’t mean to offend I really like him but now I feel like he probably thinks I’m some condescending person. Is there any way I can make it up to him?

132 comments

I applaud OP for putting the gmer in his place. The gmer needs to be repeatedly reminded that his hobby ain't shit and he needs to get over himself. No one who's well-adjusted would care if randos don't give a shit about their hobby or even consider their hobby to be one, but I could see how some dude who's addicted to blowing thousands of bucks on jpeg waifus in some trash gacha game would feel insecure about his gambling addiction. Like just step back for a second. The dude is building a fire hazard all for the sake of playing AAA slop because as even gmers know, most indies don't require the latest CPU or graphics card, which would cut down on the total wattage of the PC. How pathetic is that?
Her brother is really cool and builds computers for fun and I think that takes a level of knowledge that I don’t really posses so I’m like very happy for people who do things like that and I do see building computer is a hobby because it takes skill determination and a lot of time to do and there’s a healthy component behind I think. I think I see it as a puzzle.
Meh, building computers is just like building Legos after a certain point. Unless he's like purposely choosing a smaller form factor where the physical dimensions of the parts actually matter, it's really not a big deal. It's a bit of an open secret among IT techs that PC gmers without actual tech backgrounds (ie at least an A+ cert) are not very good with computers.
And ignore the loser Ldditors here trying to make you feel bad. They need to be shown their place (and the door) as well.
- It's a bit of an open secret among IT techs that PC g*mers without actual tech backgrounds (ie at least an A+ cert) are not very good with computers.
  Oh the horrors of someone doing something they aren't an expert in.
- Lego building and computer building clunt as hobbies cause you get a finished Lego set or working computer when ur done. Gaming isn't a hobby because it's non productive. It's play. You PLAY video GAMES. So you're playing games through the medium of video. Play is fine. Nothing wrong with play. Not how this guy is doing it but in general I think playing and games of whatever kind are essential experiences for like...most animals. But it ain't a hobby. Hobbies are productive skills you develop because you want to. Games, especially lately are meant to feel like productivity cause you advance within the game and get better at the game but when you've mastered the game, nothing changes. It doesn't become something new, the only things you did were already thought of ahead of time and written in by devs. You didn't actually do anything at all. You played a game.
  
  I think your definitions are fine although I still can't take people being uptight about other people not caring about their hobbies/leisure/play seriously. I like to collect random bugs (mostly detritivores because they have almost zero maintenance outside of occasionally giving them new decaying plant matter like dead leaves and banana peels), and it doesn't need to be anything more than me collecting random-ass bugs for fun.
- I still think building computers takes some skill like I wouldn’t know what to do even with a video or guide lol. But I don’t know the lemittors are making me feel bad, also what are they? A group of trolls or something
  
  It's really not complicated, you plug in the part to the place it goes and you plug in the right cables and you're set. Gamers just make it seem complicated because they have nothing going on in their lives
  
  Yeah, it's weird you got jumped on so hard here. And building a computer requires a degree of knowing what you're doing. It passes as hobby

132 comments