Spaghetti

Someday all food will be in cubes. Some day.

What’s wrong babe you’ve hardly touched your spaghettiloaf.

They clearly should have used an ice cream scoop.

I'm not a psychopath.

I wouldn't hesitate to cut me a slice and microwave it.
- Batter and breadcrumb your slice of congealed noodles, and pan fry it.
  (If you want to make yet another food culture twitch, you can call this a kugel.)
- Tcouple slices in the toaster to get nice and crispy, fill with Cheetos and ketchup, bone apple teeth
  
  Hell no! Not about the toaster but I'm just eating it unflavored. Its one of my childhood favorites. If I added anything to it it would be a little salsa.

Who makes PLAIN spaghetti??? Is this person my 4 year old?

i would do that. i may have already done that
- Me too. What are you supposed to do? Extra work?
  I furl each strand carefully? Soak in hot water and have slimey spaghetti? Lick the entire bundle slowly till it warms up and unfurls? Rest on bosom until it unfurls?
  
  Package up a serving of spaghetti with a serving of sauce so you can throw it in the microwave and eat?
- Believe it or not, straight to jail.

Wow, it never occurred to me this is an option. Honestly seems more efficient than trying to pry out the cold strands while trying unsuccessfully to not break them.
- If you add some olive oil to the spaghetti before storing it and don’t pack the container that tight, you won’t have that problem in the first place.
  
  It doesn’t have to be oil. A bit of water (it’s surprising how little will do) enables the starch to dissolve, which essentially glues the spaghetti together.
  
  Olive oil solidifies at fridge temperatures, surely it wouldn't help much here?
  
  But then your spaghettiis covered in olive oil, and it gets all over your hands and your crotch and your mouth, and it's just a mess.
  
  One can also just water their hands and loosen them up before reheating. It is what I do if my noodles getting to sticky after cooling them down for wok frying.
  
  Then when you go to prepare it, you have oily noodles and separated sauce at the bottom 🙃
- I just have separate containers for each serving. I reuse those plastic deli meat containers. That way I can just dump it on a plate, add a little water, cover it with another plate, put it in the microwave for a few minutes, stir and it's like fresh!

I have absolutely done that in the past, and I would do it again in a heartbeat. I can slice off exactly how much I want, getting a good feeling for the portion size. The noodles stick together, there is no unfurling and subsequent mess when transferring them to a dish. They'll loosen up a bit when heated, but stick together enough to offer a superior eating experience - just cut a piece off and consume.
- That's how I always do it. What's the big deal? Is there another way?
- Do you live in an "as seen on tv" commerical?
- Very human
  
  Mmmmhmmm, brains 🧠
- Same here, I'm a part time spaghetti vandal that breaks spaghetti at least once before throwing it in the pot.
  I also use both fork and knife to slice though the spaghetti mountain on the plate!
  But I draw the line at overcooking spaghetti, not fond of spaghetti soup.
  
  Don't get me wrong, the spaghetti in OP's picture definitely look soaked and not very appetizing. But the weird benefits I mentioned can be achieved otherwise.

What's wrong babe? You haven't touched your spaghettiloaf.

I wonder if it would hold together well enough for a grilled cheese...
- When I was a kid, my mom used to occasionally put leftover spaghetti in a pie dish as a "crust" and use that to make quiche.
  Based on that, I would say very gently dip each slice of your spabreadi in an egg wash and briefly bake. I suspect it would solidify enough for grilled cheese. Texture would probably be fucking weird though.
- You have to be stopped
  
  You stopping progress must be stopped
- You could dust each side lightly with starch of flour while still cold and fry in oil and that might hold together (and be quite crispy). Worst case, you may need to toss the noodles in the starch/flour, shape, and chill again first.
- I think you could do it but you would have to move quick.
  Slice the spaghettloaf into two slices, and spread mayo on one side of each slice. Keep the spaghettloaf in the fridge until youre ready to go.
  You want a sizable pool of oil with a high smoke point - heat it up until it's nearly smoking, then quickly add 2 sliced spaghetti, mayoless side down. The first side in the oil will form the inside of your grilled cheese, let it sizzle until it starts to crisp, then flip, add your cheese and let both outsides sizzle a minute to gain structure.
  Once both outsides have some rigidity, fold the sandwich together. Continue to flip & cook until desired color is reached.
  Sprinkle with salt, pepper, fresh parsley, and a little parmesan cheese, and dip in your favorite marinara sauce.
  Recipe can be made vegan with vegan cheese and mayo.

square spaghetti, just the way the Drifter likes it.

If Lovecraft was a chef.

I always mix the leftover pasta with the leftover sauce when I store it.
That doesn't prevent me from scooping out a portion this way, but at least the pasta isn't a brick.
- at least the pasta isn’t a brick.
  How can you eat it like a cookie if it's not a sliced brick? ;-P

Who the fuck stores plain pasta like that? It was already a giant gelatinous cube the moment you refrigerated it.
Also people please cook your pasta in the tomato sauce. Drain the pasta a minute or two before your preferred tenderness and then cook the pasta in the tomato sauce. It’s so much better.
- Yeah, I have questions about how one ends up with an entire pack of spaghetti as "leftovers".
  
  The trick is to add the pasta then add more meat and more sauce to account for the too many noodle problem. Then you take the pots and separate them into vats to meal prep for the century
- Everything about this picture is a food crime.

Alternate take :
!oddlysatisfying@lemmy.world

You need a deli slicer for that pasta loaf.

It's coming from inside the house...

Mmmm. Spaghetti loaf

This would absolutely be my husband if he opened a container like that. Scooped a hole in the middle of the brownies I made a few weeks ago.
- He is going to food jail.
- Lmao, classic troll brownie move. Bonus if he still cut out a square of brownie, but diagonally in the center.
  
  I can't eat a brownie unless it's $ shaped
- You're saying he left the lovely edge pieces for you? What a gentleman!
- Everything reminds me of donut

You been sliced!

Stop taking pictures in my house.

Use a cookie cutter like the rest of us

Desecration of a spagett
- Italians would lose their mind.
  
  Another case for Luigi

Since I am an eating monster (for some reason I need like 3200+ calories a day or my BMI goes underweight) and have a tiny fridge. This often ends up happening not on purpose when I store leftover portions.

But according to science it will have half the calories

I know enough people who break their spaghetti before cooking them or who cut them before serving them.
I die a little inside every time.
- I die a little inside every time.
  Why is that?
- I die a little inside every time I hear a noodle slurped
  
  Bet you hate Tampopo then
  https://youtu.be/sNAZmLmyCJk
- How else are you to fit them into small pots?
  
  You need to watch the pot but laying them over the pot of boiling water until they're soft enough to bend in the middle works fine.

Im not the biggest rachael ray fan but I am of a marry the sauce and noodle mind. Honestly though im a food mixer in general. I love having a bit of everything in every bite.

Wtf is wrong with that "spaghetti"? Why is it that colour? Is that actually some kind of east Asian noodle?
- It's the light, get some sleep.
  
  Nah, that stuff is made from soft wheat, not durum. I'm not in the USA, it was early evening when I wrote that comment ;)