AITA for telling my son he needs to get over his brother gf looks like his old bully

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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/LowerPossibility3324 on 2023-07-27 12:19:22+00:00.

My son Keith 16 was bullied when he was a kid, it was bad and the school sucked. It only stopped when she left the school. We live in a pretty small town and everyone kinda looks the same, super tan brown hair or blonde. The bully use to dye their hair fun colors like purple and pink. That’s not really a thing here since it’s considered improper ( think small old town, judgy grandmas)

He went to therapy for a long time and we all thought he was good, now his older brother went to college and he has a gf named Cindy. She is a sweetheart but her hair is dyed pink. She is slim built also and she looks kinda like the old bully due to the hair but it is clearly a different person.

My son can not deal with it, we insisted he goes back to therapy but he skips the lesson or just doesn’t talk about. He treat Cindy like a leper.

The final straw today was an small get together barbecue and Cindy came. She asked if anyone wanted a drink, we gave her our orders and when she asked Keith he ignored her, she rolled her eyes and went to get everyone a drink. She came back and Keith made a comment of her being too good to get him a drink also. She replied with excuse me and he repeated and called her a skank.

I grabbed him and pulled him aside, and basically told him to get over it, that’s she isn’t his bully and this is pathetic. I apologize to Cindy and told him to go home.

He told our family that I chose her over him and he is very clear he thinks I am an asshole. My husband told me to post of this website.