Is this grammatically correct: "The monkey who I'm wondering if can see my ears."
Or is it "The monkey for whom I'm wondering if they can see my ears."
or
"The monkey, regarding whom, I'm wondering if they can see my ears."
or
"The monkey who I'm wondering if they can see my ears."
All of them sound stupid.
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None of them are grammatically correct because none of them are complete thoughts let alone sentences.
All three try to specify the particular monkey by enumerating that it can see your ears but do no more.
Take away the description of the monkeys ability to see your ears and what you’re left with is “the monkey”.
“The monkey” isn’t a sentence.
If you are the subject and what’s happening is that you’re wondering if the monkey can see your ears then the sentence you want is “I’m wondering if the monkey can see my ears.”
If, as I suspect, you’re using “the monkey whose ability to see my ears I’m wondering about” as the subject of some larger more complex and cool sentence then you gotta lay out that part before someone can give solid grammatical advice.