3w ago

Danielle Smith applies for refugee status in USA

www.thebeaverton.com Danielle Smith applies for refugee status in USA

COUTTS, AB - Alberta Premier Danielle Smith has arrived on foot at the Coutts-Sweet Grass border crossing station, petitioning for refugee status in the US on the grounds of being persecuted in her home country.

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In the "Beaverton headlines I wish were real" category, I present the January 2025 winner.

I can’t believe we voted her in. I mean I can because Albertans are gullible morons, but I can’t believe it got this bad.
- Just checking you're aware the article is satire.
  
  Upon having it explained to her that applying for asylum in the United States first requires one to register with the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, Smith exclaimed “But I’m white,” before demanding to speak to the concierge at Mar-A-Lago
  Is it though?
  
  I'd argue that even knowing the article is satire, their comment stands.
  
  You can tell its satire because it sounds less insane than any of the real things Smith says or does on a daily basis.
  
  Oh I know.
- She wasn't 'voted in' in the traditional sense..
  Jason Kenney stepped down due to numerous scandals and mishaps. The conservative party of Alberta (The UCP) then held a members only vote to elect their new fuhrer.
  70k people picked her in a province of multiple million
  
  There was an election since the last UCP leadership race which they won.
  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2023_Alberta_general_election
  
  But then we got a real election and she still won. So while the job was given to her, she technically earned being Premiere. Just shows how stupid Albertans are, to have voted in someone that was anti government, anti-mask, anti-covid and pro-plastic straws.

Traitorous POS.

How can any self respecting peasant vote for this regime whore...
This Idiot can't figure which regime she is legally obligated to whore for.
How did she get elected into Canadian public office but be so willing to suck daddy Sam's dick so eagerly.
From America this looks pathetic, tell daddy Sam to get fucked. American pedons need another state.
Seeing some elements of the right entertaining these brain dead talking points is concerning though.
They don't see how this is exactly what Putin does and even entertaining them gives Russia credibility.
- The Beaverton is a satire website. This is not reality.
  
  Except it’s not satire. She really is a traitorous POS.
  
  Didnt she break with federal government after their counter tariff initiative after Trump suggested turning Canada into American state?
  Then went to mar a lago to kiss daddy's ring?
  What am I missing here?
- Dude, you are not making any sense. Are you from Alberta? She was elected to represents interests of Albertants, and this is what she is trying to do, as she understands it. It is up to the Alberta's voters to judge her next election, not some internet randos.
  
  Canadians find this as acceptable behavior?
  
  Sounds like a lot of Albertans aren’t true Canadians and need to leave.

I know people should know better but there should be a rule (or a bot that enforces this) about adding [SATIRE] before these kinds of posts
- It shows the URL, which is clearly a satire based website.
  
  And yet, it's not enough

Welp, I definitely ate the Onion with this one. Reality is so fucking bonkers at this point that it's hard to tell what's satire and what isn't.

32 comments