How should I be accessing the fediverse to get the most "federated" experience
The idea is cool with all the apps interconnecting, but where do I go to actually see this in practice. Does the cross communication only work on platforms like Mbin/piefed, or am I not seeing something.
I keep hearing thanks to activity pub posts here can be seen and replied to from elsewhere, but I haven't seen it.
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You will occassionally see some people from other platforms, like mastodon, commenting or posting here. But Lemmy isn't the most compatible one, so you probably won't see microblogs and such. If you want to see microblogs as well, use mbin (kbin fork). It is a mix of Lemmy and Mastodon. You can micro blog and comment on magazines (communities in the mbin/kbin platform) that way.
I especially am thinking of self hosting mbin because I do want to see some microblogs from some users.
Also I welcome you to Lemmy and the Fediverse. Good thing you didn't choose lemmy.world or lemmy.ml
So I know there's some drama with lemmy.world and lemmy.ml. I'm passingly familiar with the .ml stuff (that they have a large and vocal population of tankies and red-fash types), but what's the deal with lemmy.world?
It is in my opinion too big to join now as a new user, I think there are some issues with moderation also.
Fediverse needs to scale horizontally so it is bad idea to join the largest server.
Afaik they're basically banning whoever and whenever they please
That is probably true for all instances
In a sense, yes. But many people disagree specifically with what and why .world is banning.
LW's user base accounts for about 36.4% (as of writing this) of all Lemmy users (spread across approximately 570 instances according to FediDB), which is too large.
Iirc the biggest complaint has been that community mods inside .world had some affinities or apologia towards Israel's war crimes
Some people were worried they wouldn't allow users to advocate violence, which is bad. The rationale was that Dutch law supposedly prohibited it. Experiments were done and it was determined the admins allow advocating violence, which is good. But the site is full of power mods who remove calls for violence anyway, so it doesn't really matter what the admins allow.
I joined world on accident the first time and dipped when I noticed the lack of piracy
I saw someone posting from Pixelfed last week and that one surprised me, but I don't think they could reply to comments on the post if they could see them at all.