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Please let this be a turning point...

We've transitioned our 1yo out of our bed and to their own cot. We had to co-sleep after they puked on their old cot and refused to sleep at all once it was cleaned. Every time we've gotten them used to the cot something messes it up like travelling etc. but it's finally looking like something stable.

I was amazed the other night because it was the first time ever we didn't need to hold a hand or pat them to sleep, I could just lay them down in bed and watched them drift off.

The sleep is a little better but still not sleeping through the night and also constantly sick from daycare so they keep waking up cause of the coughing. When they were with us it was a lot easier to put the pacifier back in and go back to sleep but now we have to get out of bed to send them back to sleep.

Then there's also the night feeds... we're still doing a 10:30pm bottle and another bottle anywhere from 3am to 7am, it all depends on how much they ate during the day. Which they've now decided they don't like any of the food we make even though it's exactly the same stuff that would be at daycare. Which then prolongs the cycle of not eating enough and needing night feeds and then not eating much because there was milk overnight. I feel like we have to cut the night feeds somehow but it feels really cruel to starve them when they're used to it...

I just hope getting them to their own bed will be a positive turning point and we'll actually be sleeping through the night soon. I know other people have it worse but everyone I talk to directly has babies that sleep from 8pm to 8am with no stirring and no bottle, it's making me feel like I'm messing something up. Overall still feels like we're taking positive steps though.

Thanks for reading the rant.

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  • Which they’ve now decided they don’t like any of the food we make even though it’s exactly the same stuff that would be at daycare.

    Are you judging this based on dinner? Ask any pediatric dietician and they will tell you that toddlers and preschoolers are quite likely to skip dinner. It might not be the food but the fact that there is a meal at that hour which is the issue. The recommendation is to serve a full meal afternoon snack and then consider dinner a bonus meal if they even eat it at all.

    Which then prolongs the cycle of not eating enough and needing night feeds and then not eating much because there was milk overnight. I feel like we have to cut the night feeds somehow but it feels really cruel to starve them when they’re used to it…

    Trust your instincts. It is biologically normal for children to have one or two night feeds up until age 3. Though at some point you can start leaving "the offering" (a bowl of food you are comfortable cleaning up left in their room for them to eat from overnight without waking you, such as a bowl of cheerios).

    The sleep is a little better but still not sleeping through the night

    Unless you get extremely lucky, plan on your child not sleeping through the night until age 3. Instead, focus on teaching them what is appropriate for them to do by themselves when they wake in their room. You'll sleep through the night and they will wake, play with some toys, and put themselves back to sleep and everyone will thrive and be happy.

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