me_irl

Well I wouldn't want to bother her.

I don't want to be the creep that approaches women.
- Yeah... my worst fear as well.
  I'm sure its easy when you're a tall, handsome dude. If you're just the chubby dude whose not quite 6ft tall, yeah, good luck. I always worry I will come off as a creep. I'm just lonely and think they're swell.
Yeah, right? Why would they want me? May as well save us both the embarrassment and awkwardness by never interacting again, and save myself the pain by kicking down any romantic feeling or inclination I have so I'll eventually stop having them and won't have to feel bad about not being able to act on them
Fuck, sorry, I'm a lot better mentally nowadays but sometimes that still surfaces. Hard to stop over a decade of that kind of thinking and mental habits
- I know this all too well, although for me it surfaces much less as the thought of "saving myself the pain", but instead being a very aggressive: "I am so bad/worthless, any attempt by me could be genuinely hurtful/transgressive".
  Had a lot of work, therapy, life developments, it got better, but never truly vanished as this thing that sometimes bubbles up at the core of my self - some days more, some days less. Wishing you the best in your own struggles with thoughts and feelings like that.
- Fuck, that hit home. I’m with someone that I love and it’s great. I love myself and that’s great. But man, years of feeling ^^ this way. Cheers to each of us and anyone else who known this feeling.
- The important part is you're doing the work, and I want to recognize your effort and thank you for it.
  I'm on my own journey and I always have to remind myself that even though the work is hard, it is necessary to end the cycle of harm. Continuing the cycle is infinitely worse than the hard work. The more people that end the cycle, the better the world will become.
- I feel you, I'm in the same boat. However
  Fuck, sorry, I'm a lot better mentally nowadays
  Your profile picture does not signal this. Are you ok?
  I like to tell myself that it's fine, and that I can live this way, and justify it with knowing this is not a privilege. Probably I'm hiding my mental problems well enough for others not to see it, but they are there. I know I'm not fine, and another thing I know is that I would tell otherwise when it comes up.
- Why would they want me?
  I've seen total hotties being together with lawn-mower faces. Anything is possible.

Omg he's literally me

One day I'll find my soulmate.

::never leaves the house::

Are we using "dudes" in the non-gendered sense? Because I've noticed this type of behavior with women far more often than with men.

Probably based off of the societal expectation that men have to make the move.
But yeah, you're more than right with that. So many times, I've listened to lady friends tell they've got a crush on someone, and I tried to push them to make a move, because I'm dead certain that certain someone would explode from happiness, and they just look at me like I'm speaking Manganese.
Like, not even that they're lacking courage, just full on this assumption that they cannot do that, by law of nature.
Well, with the difference that ladies have a higher chance that some dude will make a move, so even if they never make a move themselves, they have a much lower risk of staying alone.
- I would also look at you funny if you were speaking manganese.