Side mirrors at head-height in the bike lane

"I am driving a lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK"

"My lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK has BLINDING WHITE LED headlights positioned EXACTLY at EYE LEVEL. "

"I am currently TAILGATING you in the RIGHT LANE even though you’re going TWENTY MILES AN HOUR over the speed limit and the LEFT LANE is OPEN."

"There are MONSTER ENERGY and FOX RACING stickers on the rear windshield of my lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK."

"There are PERFECTLY CLEAN mud tires and MASSIVE CHROME RIMS on my lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK."

"I make THIRTY-ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS a year and thought that that was a WISE FINANCIAL DECISION."

"I bring cases of BUD LIGHT to girls at high school parties while my wife and children are at home."

"My lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK has a GUN RACK which holds the AR-15 that I bought at WAL-MART."

"YETI COOLERS kick ass!"

I'm 100% white trash. I own a 90s model, 4 cylinder, 5 speed pickup truck that does everything I need it to. It isn't my daily driver because it's not a fashion accessory it's a goddamn pickup truck. The ass end being light if your bed is empty makes the things harder to handle in adverse weather. Not too mention I beat the fuck out of it, using a truck as truck doesn't leave it looking pretty. What I'm saying here, is that even down in the south where I'm at, a good chick of us think these people are dipshits too
Yeti Coolers are actually the shit though. Just never buy one from a store. Just find someone who drives one of these shiny lifted trucks and offer them a reasonable price for the one they paid full price for the next time they are freaking out about being behind on their truck payment. When you buy the cooler from them, if you want to make the world a better place, give them a box of condoms too. I'm being serious these dumbasses have the forethought of fucking goldfish. They tend to have litters and be completely surprised. The Yeti 160 that I own was bought for 40 bucks from a guy that made 12 dollars an hour, and had 5 kids (with a 6th on the way). Of all the stereotypes of these kind of people you listed I think you missed the one where they tend to fuck themselves into poverty.
Which is probably why I sound so mean about this. I don't care what someone spends there money on. If driving a lifted truck makes you happy, you do you as long as you can actually drive the thing without being a nuisance to others. But it's an entirely different story to watch a grown man spend so much money to play redneck cosplay while simultaneously pumping out kids left and right that they can't afford to give a decent life too. I'm sick of meeting people who drive these expensive cock replacements, wear overpriced fashionable camo everywhere, and blow any decent sum of money they luck into on weapons they don't even understand how to maintain, only to find out they have 6 kids and are renting a 2 bedroom trailer. So fucking frustrating to see.
This is fucking gold, could be a copypasta or new meme format.
- It’s a pre-existing copypasta.
Proof that the real joke is in the comments 👆
Jesus Christ, this is almost my brother.

If you need headlights with more lumens than the sun to drive at night, you shouldn't be allowed to drive at night.

The temptation to mirror tint my rear windshield goes up every time I drive at night
- Your rearview mirror likely has a little tab on the bottom of it. Push it when there's The Entire Sun behind you. It'll dim the mirror's reflection without changing the angle.
  If you have a newer, fancier car, you might have a digital version of that.
- you'd probably save lives in the long run
More often than not you can blame the auto industry for this. People want to migrate to LED lights for longevity reasons but the industry has no interest in OEM support for models that have already been produced, especially in the realm of upgrading/mods, so you end up with people dropping in cheap ebay replacements that have been developed without any consideration to the concentration of the beam or the design of the lens. If there was some level of first party support even to just the bare minimum of "here's how you should do it and here's the components to buy" you'd see a lot less of these issues since it's likely not the brightness of the bulb that's the issue but the way the lenses and housing were designed. In addition LED lighting has become so cheap it should be the complete default for every model but instead OEMs have decided to use it as a bargaining chip for higher trim packages.
- It's not just the cheap replacements. I had a brand new 2018 Toyota Rav4 and when I first bought it, I would get "flashed" constantly by people thinking my brights were on. They weren't. In fact, I almost never had to use the brights. It had very bright white LED's and at that point those style of headlamps were new and not many vehicles had them.
  Now that GM, Ford, and a few others use similar bulbs, the "flashing" has mostly subsided. I think people have gotten used to them. I couldn't blame anyone for being frustrated. They were excessively bright. A lot of new headlights are and I think it's a problem. I'm happy about the better visibility but I don't want to blind the person coming at me in the other lane. That's not a good situation for either of us.
So many people driving with their brights on in the city these days. It's infuriating.
- Where I am it's the exact opposite, people driving in the city at night without their headlights on at all. I think the streetlights illuminate enough that they don't remember to turn them on.

Ope, suddenly I remembered I love driving the speed limit.

Oh! A dashed line is approaching...I'm just gonna go 20 under now...
The moment one of these guys decides that my ass is a nice place to park his dick, I'm turning off cruise control until they back off. If they genuinely need past me, they can pass me. If they just want to smell my farts, they can smell em slowly.

Add BMW, Audi and modded Jeep drivers to that.

Hey no we BMW sedan drivers are victims too. We sit lower to the ground than most cars and unfortunately especially the ride height of pavement princess lifted pickups with giant bright LED headlights aligned to attempt to illuminate the stratosphere rather than directly in front of them like they’re supposed to. When the fuckers are behind me many models have headlights at the level of my rear window and side mirrors which is a problem when pickup drivers insist on riding ass all the goddamned time and even at red lights like common why do you like my exhaust smell that much? Matter of fact maybe that’s it, my car’s almost 100k miles a decade old running with a turbo tune and some mixed in high octane race fuel sometimes so the catalytic converter put in its two weeks and now those chemicals are nostalgic to the pickup truck drivers since their stupidity must be at least partially attributed to chemicals otherwise it’s near inhuman

I usually just move my mirrors to reflect it back into their eyes, easy with motorized mirrors

Heh someone in a Tesla was blinding me from behind and tailgating so I moved both side mirrors and the rear view to aim them straight back. He passed around me over the double yellow line. With him now in front of me and in traffic I just flipped my high beams on and chuckled to myself until he eventually turned off and I put my headlights back to normal :)
- Get yourself a flipper zero and you can remotely fold in their headlights/set off car alarm/ open doors of any tesla model you like. "Allegedly"
This does absolutely nothing beyond making you feel better, just FYI.
- I mean, if it's a difference between light in my eyes while driving and not, I'll choose the latter 🤷‍♀️
- Yeah that's the point. Making me feel better.
That's what I do as well.
I don't think i could aim them that well. Do they back off?

Tinted mirrors.

They saved my life.

Now I want to put LEDs on my truck.

NO SIGHT FOR YOU, CAR PEOPLE.

Not to excuse lumenbros but I don't care if you're going 100 over the speed limit, if you're in the left lane, someone wants to pass you and you can move over, move over. Then they can go the speed they want and you can go the speed you want.

Funny how everyone just seems to assume that people are in the left lane anytime anyone brings up shitbags tailgating.
People tailgate. They tailgate in the left lane. The right lane. The turning lane, the parking lot, fuck they probably tailgate in driveways.
There is no excuse for it. Whether or not you want to go faster than the person in front of you or not. It is dangerous and selfish under all circumstances.
- I actively go slower the closer they get to my bumper, eventually I get slow enough that they feel confident enough that their expensive car or truck can pass
- Well if you're not in the scenario I just outlined I guess I'm not talking about your situation, am I?
Only if you aren't passing people. If you're in the left lane and passing those on the right, you have no obligation to move over just because someone behind you wants to go faster.
This all assumes there isn't significant congestion causing all lanes to be mere travel lanes below the speed limit.
- I'd say as long as you're passing at a reasonably higher speed than the right lane. I don't think rigs should ever be allowed in the left lane, let alone "passing" another rig going 69 while you're going 70
- Glad you said the second part, as someone who frequents the traffic heavy 405 I don't think we have passing lanes anymore sometimes.
Not all roads have left lanes
- Who said anything about roads?
- Then I guess my comment doesn't apply to those situations, does it? Plus I'm also talking about sidewalks and grocery store aisles, damn slow walkers.
I definitely feel you on those people that insist on floating in the left lane for miles and miles, though this is a really peculiar context to relate in. You'd ostensibly be getting over for the lighted asshole, and this comment section isn't about to do anything kind for the asshole.