respect dandelions!

The other day I saw a rabbit eating dandelions from my yard it was very cute

♪ toss a coin to your witcher ♪

Best gardening definition I have heard:
if it grows and you didn't want to, it's a weed
if it doesn't grow and you wanted it to, it's a flower
- What are the other two called?
  If it grows and you wanted it to
  If it doesn't grow and you didn't want it to
  
  A “success” and “not a problem”

Dandelions are the only plant that spreads using children wishes

I challenge the best gardener or botanist to grow weeds.
you think it's easy, but in practice, it's impossible
- You rang?
  
  Cool flowers dude
  
  did you try to grow it intentionally?
  therefore, it's not a weed. sorry

Like bears but more athletic?

Americans be talking about "non-native" plants on the world wide web

Now if only my city would agree with that instead of sending a citation for having an overgrown yard

I was in my teens before I discovered that "weed" just meant "plant you don't want." There is not really a biological definition of weed. Anything is a weed if you don't want it there.
- therefore, it is impossible to grow a weed intentionally.

Dandelions are now basically considered native around most of the globe. There is compelling evidence both ethnobotany and genetic that dandelion are native to both Eurasia and North America.
- Wait, what? Expand on this.
  
  The gist from what I have read (mostly from Native American herbalists) is that there is a oral cultural tradition for using dandelion for both food and medicine in North America. These oral traditions have various uses for the plant that likely predate European settlement. The basic concept is that Europeans never considered that a plant that they had in Europe could appear in North America unless they brought it. It was never considered to be native in both places even though the people who used in North America have a long tradition of use back by an oral tradition. However, since this was an oral tradition no one thought to consider it valid since it wasn't written down. Since this has been suggested there is some genetic studies that back up that concept.
  I found most of this information on the Dandelion section in Plants Have So Much to Give Us, All We Have to Do Is Ask: Anishinaabe Botanical Teachings. They have a good description and I have seen it mentioned now in a few other books.
  
  And to expand on what the other commenter said, considering the logical side of it, those seeds seem very optimized to ride air currents around the entire hemisphere, especially when there's a storm that can get them very high up.

Anyone whose ever made dandelion wine knows that they WILL fuck you.
- A friend’s dad made this and we stole some as teens.
  He wasn’t mad, he knew we learned a lesson.
  
  What's the deal with dandelion wine? Is it really strong, or just an intense flavor?
  
  I’m pretty sure that’s the only reason my great uncle used to make fortified tomato wine. I wasn’t around for it, but it seems to have exclusively been drunk by his kids, to their great regret. He could always tell by the uncontrollable retching
- What was it like?
- But not in a good way.
- Off-topic but I heard second-hand that smoking camomile hits very hard.

I thought dandelions were now recognized as not a great food source for bees
We converted most of our yard into a native wildflower garden and I see a lot of bees these days. We also get fireflies in the summer now.
- This! Dandelion pollen does not contain all the amino acids necessary to support native bees. However, because they come up first and bees often become attracted to the first things they feed on, they can actually make bees addicted to them. Because they can’t meet their nutritional requirements with them, they die.
  Plant native plants people!
  
  Native where?
  
  Plant native plants people!
  Supposedly they may be native.
  https://midwest.social/comment/17680677

I am entirely over 'blank won't fuck you' as a response to shit. It's cliched and trite and kills a conversation.

We planted redflower currant and the bees and bumblebees love the shit out of that. Also much prettier than dandelions. Redflower currant is the plant you want to fuck, dandelion is the one you have a chance with.
- Isn’t red flower currant is a type of shrub with berries?
  
  A shrubbery?
- That’s a whole ass bush though, totally different thing
  
  whole ass-bush

I just mowed (parts of) my lawn. Left some clumps of different wildflowers standing, dandelions included.
I'm glad my neighbourhood does not have a Lawn Enforcement Agency.

there are a ton of less PITA pollinators than dandelions
there is a pollinator 'round here that competes with the dandelion that is very dandelion like but actually houses native butterfly cocoons
so the dandelions get ripped up round here
- you mean milkweed, it has to be native milkweed, otherwise the ornamental ones, usually the tropical ones can do more harm than good.
- Kill the lawn cop within yourself

they're very yummy in teas! I'm actually currently sipping a "s'mores" flavored tea that uses roasted dandelion root, I find it quite nice.
- Dandelion leaves (blanched) are good in salads and pestos.

guzzles 15 Dandelion Decoctions

If you stop mulching or pulling out dandelions in the garden, that will soon be the only thing you're growing
- My ~~body~~ lawn is a machine that turns non-dandelions into dandelions.
- Depends on how agressive the grass is, we got some kind of tall(over six feet if left alone) cat tail looking grass that hasn't lost the fight yet after 20 years
- If you have a dandelion problem I would recommend you mulch / mow the dead dandelions you pull back into your yard. Dandelions are a dynamic accumulator which means they are very good at pulling up vitamins and minerals from the soil which they incorporate into their roots leaves, etc. This means dandelions will contain those minerals when being mulched and mowed back into your yard. If you are having a dandelion problem it likely mean your yard needs one or more of the minerals that they accumulate. So my mowing it back in you will feed your lawn and reduce their appear in the future
- Where I live it's frankly too dry for uniform grass lawns and dandelions will completely take over if left alone. I'd be fine with it if I didn't find the green jagged leafed plant and milky red stems so fugly, never mind the nice yellow flower.
  I've been overseeding with white clover and native wildflowers since moving in both of which thrive in the spring choking out dandelions naturally. Puts nitrogen back into the soil too unlike grass.
  All I do is aerate now.
  Better for the bees in two ways. One, I'm not spraying chemicals and two, dandelions are actually pretty shit tier from a bee perspective.
- Objection m'Lord!
  I present to the court, exhibit A: https://youtu.be/bpEy-Mpm6AI

I'm mildly allergic so yeah they will fuck me up.
If I'm in an enclosed space with one (e.g. car) I'll start a sneezing fit. And I assume if I eat one my mouth will itch or swell (not even gonna attempt it).

In my garden the dandelions turned out to be Sowthistle. Which should be handy if any hungry sows show up on my second-floor apartment balcony.
- theres alot of dandelion look alike species growing here too.

Mettic is just pissed the dandelions think hes lame.