JD Vance to Americans: Get Off Tinder and Have a Baby

One can imagine Vance as the type of person who spends a lot of time thinking about how other people have sex

- Farbeit from me to overwrite what anyone says about their sexuality, but as a bi guy Ive seen probably 20 gay guys exactly like JD Vance and 0 straight guys anything like him lol
- A flower?
- Big Yellow King vibes
- Bahahahaha you beat me to it

In this economy?!?

- Yeah... at this stage, procreating is a clearly unethical choice. I really feel sympathy for the children of today, their lives will not be great.
Yes, you need to buy a couch to fuck (on)
- Let me tell you something: if a man could fuck a woman in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house
  -Dave Chappelle

Just scrolling by, and...

Fucking lol.

He's just upset there isn't a version of Grindr for furniture.

Furnitr
NSFW tag, Jesus Christ dude
- No. You must look upon his child.
I'm sorry but this is completely unacceptable format for this media.
Can you please put this is a meme format and re-upload it as its own post? This image and caption needs its own safe space to be discussed in detail.
Regards, The world.

Wait hold on

Tinder is a way to make babies, why would he want people off of Tinder?

Nobody is matching with him :(
- Come on, he uses Grindr.

I've had just about enough of this mofo's ridiculous eyeliner...

I see him as a failed unsuccessull jack sparrow wannabe
The one compliment anyone got from Trump's first admin was that "smokey eyes" thing, and JD's just latched on to it hard

We had three, and they all hate you.

Me to JD: get off my planet and have throat cancer.

Americans To JD Vance: Find something tall and fall from it.

Nothing suppresses the procreation instinct quite like JD Vance speaking about procreation.

Edit: Here's an nightmare scenario I unfortunately thought of, and will now share it with everybody. Imagine JD Vance stumping for increasing the birth rate, and watching him awkwardly try to touch pregnant women's bellies while interacting.

You're pregnant? OK. Good.
How far along are you? OK. Good.
Eww
- Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.

James Donald Bowman is a terrible human being

And I will deadname him every chance I have

Who is that and why are they relevant to this article?
- It's the birth name of Vance, who changed it as he doesn't want to be reminded of the abusive asshole named Donald that spawned him, only to cuck for another abusive asshole named Donald.
- It's the same couchfucker. His birth name has changed a couple times, most recently to Vance around the time he graduated college.

Bold advice from a couch-fucker

Pornhub all the way...no nagging, no baby diapers or teaching nothing.

Does he not know what Tinder is for? 🤔

Not for finding sexy couches in your area

Does he not know what Tinder is?

Tinder is for finding matches. Sexual predators and rapists don't need that to get someone pregnant. Basically he says you don't need to date to get someone pregnant. Just do it. That's calling for rape.
- I'd call that take on his words insane if not for the fact that it's the best explanation of his intent I've heard.

Your masters want you to breed. Whether you can afford a child or not.

does JD Vance know where babies come from

Pretty sure he thinks that babies are conceived during and pop out 9 months after your wedding in a STATE APPROVED church

We need to ban sex and genital obsessed religious freaks from being able to effect politics.

what other useful advice is he giving?

tell poor people to get more money?

Hey nerds! Why don't you fuck?!
- Gringo abe （2025）

fondly remembering the fate of the last politician who told young people to get out and have sex

Get off the couch and stop getting off on the couch, someone should tell this antidei fuck

People end up with some truly bizarre beliefs when they're determined to decree what it is that made this country great and so could make it great again, but immediately reject the things that actually did make it great - good wages, progressive taxes and social services.

Does he believe humans can reproduce asexually?

but most people are on tinder to get off

This American to JD Vance(and other Republicans): stop worrying so much about other people’s bedrooms, it’s the behavior of creeps and pervs.

But what if I don't enjoy having a baby and would rather have a vegetarian meal instead? Not all of us are carnivores.

no breed!! ONLY preg!!

The Glalthian Mining Consortium needs bodies, so get to procreating humans!

guys don't pile on him. he doesn't know how babies are made because he only fucks couches. for him sex never leads to a baby couch so how would he know. for all he knows babies happen to people randomly, but more likely 9 months after they're out of town.

What does he think people use Tinder for? Preaching the bible? lmao

Yeah, get moving building the slave class workforce they need to prop up the oligarchy!!

Cool, so we’re going to file anti-trust suits against matchgroup, right..?

population collapse is, honestly, a big problem and will increase / be drastic in 1-2 decades when it fully hits.

...so make everything about having a child (housing, child care, food, healthcare) cheaper.

ffs

Hell I have no faith that would get fixed in my life. So I got snipped
Partner and I have VERY expensive medical issues. Not going to make a kid go through that

Wish in one hand, fuck a couch in the other, see which one fills up first

He could just lie. He could say all the right things his base wants to hear about how things are unaffordable and how they're going to fix it. He could grand stand about how Trump is going to make babies great again or something.

But he just says dumb shit instead. Truly the blind leading the blind.

I would like to see Vance try another conservative dating app that will not crash and burn by having a million men and five women. Please make it happen

This guy is tone deaf.

Nah, we're on a birthstrike

Couches can't get pregnant JD

Americans: No.

Why have a pudgy little baby when there’s always one on your TV next to the President?

I'm single... (also not American, but that's besides the point).

If the sorry state of the broken society we live in isn't express incentive to not have kids at all cost, I don't know what is. I'll chop my dick off before I ever cum anywhere near a vagina. If the next presidential administration strips employers of various freedoms they've been using to abuse people and forces them to treat people better (which would never happen), MAYBE then I'll reconsider but even then probably not.

That works both ways. "Get off Grindr and stop fucking couches."

Thanks America, for putting absolute psycho pieces of shit in charge of our lives.

But the Nazis HATE babies