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23 comments

  • Cats and dogs mark their territory with urine and poop.

    So they think the toilet is you most holy place as you constantly mark only that space and nowhere else.

    They want to be included in your inner sanctum.

  • My cat feels he's got to be invited in and demands I open the window so everyone and sundry can see me crap while he enjoys a nice breeze and wildlife voyeurism. Then while I'm mid-crap he decides we're done here and if I don't let him out prompto the whole house is gonna burn down.

    Meanwhile if I don't let him in he's scratching up the door like he's trying to call 911 for a murder. Honestly don't know which is better but I guess my shits have gotten faster...

    Ftr this wasn't better when we lived alone and I'd leave the door open. He'd just stand at the entrance yowling like he was reporting a fire. I have been informed by family his shits smell worse than mine so idk what he was complaining about. Especially cause when he craps he immediately tries to vacate the premises like he just left a bomb and a quick sashay out will save him from the shrapnel.

  • I lock the door even when I'm home alone. I dont want any dogs, or toddlers, or even my wife in there. I'll go down to the basement, even. To the Shit Dungeon, my sanctuary.

23 comments