Did a single night trip in the Tetons on the Green Lake/Granite basin loop on Labor Day weekend with my husband+dog and my friend who is a casual backpacker. Got rained on like crazy on the second day, part of the same storm system that gave Miles grief.
I go about once a year with this friend, and I really don't know if I will do it again. I'm basically an unpaid guide for her, and she doesn't have the same stamina/conditioning as me and DrBohr. Worse, she doesn't seem to understand how dangerous conditions can actually arise and how sometimes you have to hike fast, get uncomfortable, and get out back to safety. We estimated we would be out before noon on day 2 and would miss the worst rain, and I communicated these concerns and considerations... but we were so slow (and I built in more time!) that we got slammed with rain the last four miles, the trail turned to running streams and thick mud. Thunder was rumbling up high.
I was really mad for a day, and then I realized that I can't blame her for who she is. But I do have to take responsibility as trip "leader" for safety (I do the initial trail planning and navigating on trail - husband is a partner in giving feedback and learning the planned route and executing the plan). I want us to go in, have a great time, and get out safely taking into account conditions. But I don't have the ability to accurately plan a trip with her, especially when our margins of safety go down.
Sorry to hear you got rained on but glad to hear you made it out ok. My wife and I have lost a hiking friend years ago after a harder-than-expected Presidential Traverse with a friend who had gotten badly out of shape. Back then we didn’t really know anything and didn’t realize what we were getting into. But it sounds like you do know what you’re doing; is there an opportunity to limit trips with the casual friend to lower risk endeavors?
Oof that sounds tough. Sorry you lost a hiking buddy.
Yeah, husband and I talked about limiting to low risk, short endeavors (7 miles max per day) but that makes it quite challenging to do something around here. And we will have to go on bluebird days only, meaning being willing to cancel a planned hike.
Give me a year... I'm sure by then I will be willing to come up with something. Right now I'm still, shall we say, not in the mood.