We’re autistic, and one of the characteristics of being autistic is that we feel things deeply. On the positive side, when we are happy, we feel immense joy compared to others. On the negative side, we feel painful emotions more strongly than others as well. Because of this, many of us have been invalidated, insulted, or pushed away when all we were wanting was to share what we were going through and get support. Maybe even a really tight hug and someone telling us that it makes sense that we feel that way.
While we can’t give hugs, we can help each other by sharing our pain and having others help us through it. So here is that post. What’s bothering you? Why? Tell us.
Note 1: Sort by New to see the most recent posts.
Note 2: This post in particular will be especially moderated in terms of trolling, abusive, derogatory, offensive, disrespectful, invalidating, accusatory, or antagonizing responses to a user's pain. If your response is removed by mods, but you think you make a valid point, try rephrasing it in a compassionate manner that is not dismissing or accusatory.
The list is extensive, but I've forced myself into this place of complete numbness so I can operate to a tiny degree each day. Like I'm 'living the dream' since I'm a shut-in NEET who plays games and watches TV. But it's a hollow lonely existence. I live with my mom and she's understanding and I help her how I can. Some of that help is cooking, yard work, and listening to her complain. If I complain it's the end of the world so I just have to bottle up everything and put on my best 'okay face'. Can't complain to her and can't complain to people online.
For example I'm in a clan in Destiny 2 as it's one of my games. I love the game but it has massive issues. If I mention those issues everyone acts like I'm an asshole and I've been warned to 'tone down the negativity' or I'd be removed. It's not even negativity... I'm pointing out that X or Y doesn't work most of the time. And if I dare say I'm doing anything other than amazing it's like someone walking into a room and shitting on the floor. I don't have any friends really and every community I've been a part of has always booted me out because they don't like something about how I interact with them.
I'm really lonely. Physically I haven't been touched in almost a decade and I've given up on finding a significant other since I'm a shut-in NEET with crippling gender dysphoria and anxiety. Like no one is going to take on the burden that I am even if I am loving and whatever. So I just exist in this state of numbness so I don't scream or talk to myself in a gibbering mess of tears.
Oh yeah those commercials about getting healthcare, in the USA, for $10 or less with assistance? Absolute bullshit. My mom got pissy with me that I needed to look into it. So I spent an hour doing their paperwork to find out it'd still cost me $200 and up for insurance with assistance. $200 is more than I would make in 4 or 5 years if I was lucky lol
The remaining player base is rife with toxic positivity. I'm a former destiny addict, but I quit a long time ago, and so did most of the people I used to play with. The game sucks now, and it's not coming back.
Yeah all the clans I've been in always end up very insular (ie only play with a select few people) and since I play a lot solo (due to anxiety and not wanting to screw others over by messing up even if I'm a good player) I find fault with stuff. And when I bring up those issues I'm always told I'm being too negative or some such. Like this Dawning has some major issues and I brought some of them up today and had to try to say it nicely.