I grew up on a farm, I've killed and slaughtered my own food my whole life and I always felt good about eating meat because of that fact.
As I get older I'm really starting to hate killing things, I don't want to end a life at all. My couple of vegetarian days might turn into a whole lifestyle.
You've got this! There are a ton of benefits to going plant-based. Dominion is a great documentary to show how most (~90%) are treated, which emphasizes the importance for us to shift away (it doesn't sound like the way you did it was as bad as this, but this is the info that made me swap away recently).