Lets be perfectly clear here, conspiracies are real. I don't know what the fuck you mean by this comment. Yes, there are outlandish conspiracy theories and most are bullshit. But that doesn't make all conspiracy theories bullshit. Some (many) have to be true, because many end up turning out to be true.
It’s because that human shaped walking mist of piss farts has never done an honest thing in his life. Don’t be so shocked that people will not believe this either. Right out of the gate there’s things that make it incredibly suspicious.
It's like watching a fifth grader struggle with their homework. Except I don't expect the fifth grader to know anything yet. XKCD's lucky ten thousand is not helping these people this time.