I this a firm and polite way to tell an opinionated coworker to stop pushing his agenda I don't care about?
I this a firm and polite way to tell an opinionated coworker to stop pushing his agenda I don't care about?
cross-posted from: https://linux.community/post/906126
I've observed if I say nothing (because I simply don't know how to react), opinionated people think you agree with them, which I don't. I don't care.
what I want to tell him, next time he starts ranting: 'I don't care what you think, leave me alone'.
However, I may have to work with this person in the future, so what about 'you don't have to tell me everything you think, most of the time I don't pay attention' and if he keeps pushing it 'it's tiring working with a person who has to rant to feel good, it's boring and makes me ignore you, which is a problem, because we work together.' And leave.
What about 'everybody has problems, maybe talk to a therapist? I cannot help you'.
Or maybe simply leaving when he starts his rants?
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change the subject
This isn't a good idea. This is just burying the issue rather than confronting it.
They will bring it up later.
Not if every time they start up you start talking about fossil species.
"You see what they are up to now?"
"That's a good question. Personally I am a fan of Cambrian, but who can deny how good the Permian was. Sure, the Jurassic had all the dinosaurs, but stuff Radiodonts and Hallucigenia are just so cool."
If YOU become the person who talks about boring stuff all the time, you force THEM to avoid you! Genius!
Or, it turns out that they also enjoy dinosaurs and you can geek out together about that!
Doesn't have to be ancient life, you could also tell them about:
Farming techniques in the middle ages centering around Southern France in comparison to Manchuria.
Your favorite clothes buttons of the Victorian era.
The nuances of tardigrade body language.
The evolution of footwear prior to hard soles.
The fascinating history of rivets.
How women in the early 1900s are responsible for how unhealthy fast food is today and why the government can't do anything right.
All about the history of houndstooth as it relates to fashion and feudalism.
Why they should bring back lawn darts for the betterment of our schools.
And so many more conversations that will allow you to work in peace.
Exactly.
And people around you will laugh at them, appreciating your approach.
That's why I said be repetitive. It takes time. When they learn that all you do is go off on a tangent, they'll stop trying to use you for their personal sounding board.
In a way, you're responding to them in kind by reframing the convo to a subject in which they aren't interested.
You wanna be insensitive to others, and ignore the social cues that other's aren't interested just so you can selfishly rant? OK, I'll do the same, only with a subject that isn't divisive or inappropriate.
"How about those Mets?"
Said every time, unvarying, as a response.
When all they ever get from you is utterly unrelated, they'll stop.
Or just change the subject completely, don't even acknowledge what they said, or make it really ridiculous. Like they talk politics, say" yea, my dog does this weird thing when politicians come on the tv" then tell a long, meaning, drawn-out, meaningless, made-up story about your non-existent dog.
Or "I don't really know anything about it, and don't really care to. Hey have you seen that email about vacation?"