Apple car is not the issue. It’s all the other touch inputs that I have on my car to control every basic function like the climate controls and other shit.
Apple car switches on, already the navigation is setup and the music is on… I don’t need to touch it again. I can switch songs on my steering wheel and I can ask Siri for basic shit like finding a playlist.
I don’t need to go through a touch menu or button to change the temperature or any other action setting while in motion.
in fact, much of CarPlay's functionality becomes locked while the car is in motion, making that a moot point anyway, lol. the only things left to distract or endanger would be the OEM stuff, as you mention.
I mostly use Waze for navigation. And the alerts button setting is pretty small. However I find that just having it on alerts is enough for day to day use.
It’s true that for new routes I do enable the full guided voice assist
i don't use it enough to know, but i think the UI varies a little between vehicles and models, so it may not be in the same spot for everyone-- or even look exactly the same.
as for a Siri command, you may try something like, "Set my notifications to..." or something like that.