Honest question, I’d love to host email but it seems like a huge pain in the ass these days with trying to keep from being delisted. Is there a decent, home user accessible email system that’s useable out there?
A decade ago it was easy and doable but even in professional life I don’t deal with email backend anymore, all google or o365.
You'll never get away from maintenance for ant service you host, and you need a VPS at a minimum to handle mail unless your ISP allows it (which they probably don't). There's going to be front loading needed in order to make sure the IP you're given isn't on blocklists, and you'll need to take appropriate measures with Apple, M$, Google, Yahoo, etc in order to send email to their domains. The good thing is that I've you do that, you'll never need to touch it again.
I personally use iRedMail because of the breadth of documentation, but mailcow and others like that are allegedly nice. I prefer the omnibus solutions because I don't care to do manual service configuration if it's not necessary.
Been doing email hosting for my domain for 25 years, 12 years with iRedMail.
I'm also using iredmail. Apart from it needing more hardware than it used to its been pretty stable. I use an SMTP Relay for sending mail, so I don't hit issues with sending. Not that I ever actually send many emails.